


Wrapped Around Your Finger

by FanOfTA



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M, side Sehun/Irene relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 15:50:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 34,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10994085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanOfTA/pseuds/FanOfTA
Summary: Sehun had everything, or at least he thought he did. Then he met Junmyeon, and everything fell apart.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the 2016 round of Xunmian and I'm now cross-posting it here.
> 
> I WILL NOT BE RESPONDING TO QUESTIONS REGARDING WHO TOPS OR BOTTOMS.

      Sehun sighed as he leaned against the counter in a small cafe where he worked. His eyes were either constantly staring at the door or constantly staring at the clock. His shift would be ending soon and he was meeting his girlfriend afterward to see a movie. The cafe was particularly slow today, so watching the clock was about as productive as Sehun could get. A coworker smacked him on the back of the head playfully.

      “Look, I know you're eager to ditch me for your girlfriend, but at least try to be less obvious about it,” a girl around Sehun's age grumbled.

      “What the hell, Seulgi!” He whined, rubbing his head.

      “You're practically drooling on the counter watching the clock,” she snapped, pointing at it. “If you're gonna ditch me for my best friend, you could at least make it so I don't have to clean up after you.”

      “I wasn't drooling,” Sehun huffed indignantly.

      “Mhm, sure.”

 

      Sehun opened his mouth to protest, but the ring of the bell above the door stopped him. Almost instantly, he stood up straight, assuming his most attractive, respectable working persona. Seulgi did much the same, donning a sweet, welcoming smile.

      “Welcome!” They said in unison.

 

      A girl stood in the doorway, looking at both of them with wide eyes, as if they were nuts. As soon as Seulgi and Sehun realized who it was, they instantly relaxed, groaning a little. The girl entered the cafe and walked right up to the counter, smiling knowingly.

      “That was oddly in sync...” She commented cheekily. “You two were bickering again, weren't you?”

      “No!” Sehun and Seulgi denied simultaneously. The other girl giggled and shook her head.

      “I don't know how you two still work here together. If the manager knew how much you argued, he'd probably fire you both for being annoying.”

      “Excuse me, ma'am,” Seulgi said sweetly. “Would you like to order something? And please take your stupid boyfriend so he's out of my hair?”

 

      The other girl laughed and glanced up at the menu. Sehun watched her silently as she skimmed the list, fingers delicately tapping her lips as she considered each option. He didn't even care that Seulgi had insulted him. His girlfriend was here, and that instantly lightened his mood. It also meant that once he made her drink, his shift would be up and he would be free to go.

      “I think I'll just have a hot Chai tea,” the girl sighed. Seulgi typed it into the register and Sehun tapped her shoulder.

      “I got it.”

 

      Seulgi rolled her eyes, but smiled nonetheless. Sehun had already turned around and started making the drink. Seulgi leaned forward so that she was really close to the other girl's ear.

      “Your boyfriend's such a gentleman, Joohyun~” She whispered playfully. “I'd almost be jealous were it not for the fact that I have to deal with mopping up the drool as he slacks off~”

      “Don't you have tables to clean?” Sehun grumbled, walking back over to them and handing Joohyun her drink before paying for it. “My shift is over now, so I'm gonna head out!”

 

      He took off his apron, threw on his sweater, and headed around the counter to where Joohyun was standing. He wrapped his arm around her waist and started ushering her away. As they left he heard Seulgi call out once more.

      “Have fun on your date!”

 

      Sehun walked alongside Joohyun, listening as she talked animatedly. She was always the more talkative one, but Sehun genuinely loved listening to her stories. Even the most mundane happenings became their own little adventure when she described them. Then again, perhaps it was just because Sehun was in love with her.

 

      They had been dating for about 6 months. Joohyun was 22, about 2 years older than Sehun. She was friends with Seulgi, which was how they initially met. They'd hit it off pretty well in the beginning, and a few months later, Sehun found himself asking her out. Since then, they'd been happily dating and almost attached at the hip. They both still seemed to be in the starstruck phase. Seulgi often teased them, saying it made being around them unbearable sometimes, but Sehun could tell she was really happy for both of them. Sehun wondered sometimes when the new would wear off their relationship. Honestly, he hoped it didn't any time soon.

 

      Dates after they both got off work were quite common. Today was no exception. They were off to see a movie in the theater and eat dinner afterwards. Joohyun had been dying to see a new romantic comedy film that had just come out. They both liked to watch a lot of movies together of various genres. Joohyun would sit through most action films as long as it wasn't overly grotesque, and Sehun would watch romantic comedies and even musicals. He wasn't quite ready to admit it, but he actually really liked both.

 

      As Joohyun was walking, she got a little further ahead of Sehun. His eyes wandered from her soft, brown hair, down to the light purple sweater that she was wearing, down to the tight pair of jeans covering her legs. It was a simple look, but she somehow managed to make even the plainest of attire look amazing.

 

      His eyes widened when he noticed a dark red spot in between her legs. He immediately slipped his sweater off, shuddering as a cold breeze blew by, then snaked his arms around Joohyun's waist, tying the sleeves in front of her. He wrapped his arms around her stomach, resting his chin on her shoulder, and placed a kiss on her cheek.

      “What's up?” She asked, turning her head so she could see him.

      “You bled through,” he whispered. Her eyes went wide and she smacked her hand over her mouth.

      “Oh my God...”

      “It's ok. I covered it.”

      “No, it's not ok,” Joohyun stated in a panicked voice. “I don't have a change of pants or anything!”

      “Shh, it's ok,” Sehun soothed once more, snuggling her close. “There's a convenience store right around here. Let's go there first and see what we can find, ok?”

      “Oh my God...I'm so sorry...”

 

      Sehun shushed her once more and held her close as they headed to the store. He knew she was very easily embarrassed and something like this was mortifying for her, so he just wanted to try to keep her calm. He also knew her moods shifted even worse when she was on her period, so cheering her up was his first priority.

 

      When they got to the convenience store, they headed straight for the female products section. Sehun kept his arm wrapped around Joohyun's back as she skimmed the shelf for the brand of tampons that she used. After that, she grabbed a small pack. Normally she had them in her purse, but today had to be the one day she forgot to pack them.

      “I'm going to need to change my pants...” She said quietly, looking down at the ground.

      “That's ok. We can run by your house.”

      “We'll miss our movie if we do that.”

      “It's fine. We can see it another day.” She frowned and placed her forehead on Sehun's chest.

      “I'm so sorry...”

      “It's ok,” he soothed, hugging her and rubbing her back. “You have nothing to be sorry about. This kind of stuff happens.”

      “I really wanted to see the movie though,” she pouted.

      “Well, would one of your family members be able to help?” Sehun suggested. “Like bring you a change of clothes or something?” She pulled away slightly and looked at him with wide eyes.

      “Maybe my brother! I think he was off work today. Lemme give him a call.”

 

      She pulled her phone out of her purse and dialed a number. As she listened to it ringing, she leaned against Sehun's chest once more and he rubbed her back. Finally, the other line connected.

      “Ah, Junmyeon? What are you up to right now?” There was a pause. “Could you do me a huge favor please?” Short pause. “I need a change of pants and underwear,” she explained really quietly, getting a bit shier. “I started my period and I'm out with Sehun...” A slightly long pause. “Yeah, we're at the convenient store near the cafe where Seulgi works, you know the one. Thank you, Junmyeon, you're a life saver! Oh! And bring one of your extra sweaters please? One of the bigger ones?”

 

      She hung up the phone and looked up bashfully at Sehun. She gave him a small thumbs up and he smiled, hugging her close and swaying her slightly.

      “See, everything will be ok,” he mumbled into her hair.

      “It's still really embarrassing though...”

      “It'll be ok. Let's just get you taken care of.”

 

      Sehun walked with her over to the cashier. He grabbed a chocolate bar from the nearby display and placed it next to the box of tampons. After, he pulled out his wallet and paid for both items. Joohyun looked up at him with a small pout and he simply grabbed her hand and the bag and lead her out of the store so they could watch for her older brother.

 

      Sehun kept her snuggled close while they waited. She'd started sipping at her tea once more, which was a sign that she was at least calming down a little. Sehun was shivering because of the autumn breeze, but he figured it would be ok. Joohyun was managing to keep him somewhat warm at least. Eventually, she sighed.

      “I really am sorry about this, Sehun...I should have been more prepared...”

      “Last I checked, this wasn't exactly something you can always prepare for,” Sehun sighed. “I mean, you can count the days but still, you can't know exactly when it'll start, right?”

      “I know, I just...I feel bad. You and my brother have to deal with this now...”

      “I don't mind one way or the other,” Sehun shrugged. “I'm happy to help.”

      “Thank you...You and my brother really are my life savers...”

      “Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever met your brother.”

      “Really? I guess it makes sense since he moved to his own apartment about a year ago. He still drops by our house all the time though, so I'm sure you'll see him there eventually.”

      “What's he like?”

      “His name's Junmyeon. He's 25 and works as an accountant. Not the most exciting job, but it pays him well and he's smart and efficient. We've always been there for each other.”

      “Sounds like a good guy.”

      “He really is. I hope you'll like him as you get to know him.”

      “Guess I'll have to see,” Sehun shrugged. He dug into the bag and pulled out the chocolate bar. “For now, eat this while we wait for him.”

      “Sehun...”

      “You deserve chocolate and I know you want it,” Sehun teased, pulling open the wrapper and holding it to her mouth. She sighed and took a bite.

      “Fine,” She huffed, taking the bar from him.

 

      She leaned against him and nibbled away as they waited outside. Occasionally she would hold it up to Sehun's mouth so he could have a bite as well. Just as they were finishing the chocolate, a car pulled into one of the parking spaces. Joohyun immediately perked up.

      “That's his car!”

 

      Soon enough, the door opened and a man slid out of the seat. He had soft features and his bangs were fluffed down, covering his forehead. He was wearing jeans and a form fitting sweater, looking fairly casual but still insanely attractive. Sehun wasn't about to dwell on that last fact though.

 

      The man leaned back into the car, grabbing something out of the passenger seat, then he shut the door, locking the car behind him. He walked over to Joohyun and immediately handed her the bag.

      “Thank you so much,” she said gently, hugging him. The man smiled and Sehun's heart fluttered slightly at the sight.

      “Of course! I wasn't going to just leave you in a situation like this. Now go change!”

      “Alright...I'll be right back...” She said shyly, glancing at both men.

 

      Sehun nodded and handed her the store bag. Before leaving, she dug into the bag of clothing and pulled out the sweater she'd asked her brother to bring, then handed it to Sehun. He looked at her in confusion.

      “Wear that for today...I don't know if I bled through on your sweater, but I'd rather wash it first before you wear it again...”

      “Ok...” Sehun mumbled, taking the sweater. He was freezing at this point, so any source of warmth was welcome.

      “I'll be right back!”

 

      She rushed into the store, leaving the two men alone. Sehun quickly threw on the sweater, noting that it was a little small, but not unwearable. His eyes began roaming over her brother once more, taking in each aspect. He was shorter than Sehun, but he was still extremely attractive. Good genes really ran in Joohyun's family. Sehun realized he didn't even know the man's name. He flushed slightly when he noticed his gaze was being returned.

      “I don't think we've been formally introduced,” the other man started. “I'm Junmyeon, Joohyun's older brother.”

      “I'm Sehun, her boyfriend...”

      “So you're the notorious, lucky guy,” Junmyeon laughed, holding his hand out.

 

      Sehun took it and was instantly amazed at how warm it was. It must have been because he was still really cold.

      “It's good to finally meet you,” the man continued.

      “The same for you,” Sehun agreed. “Joohyun's spoken pretty highly of you.”

      “It's all an act,” Junmyeon laughed. “She's always telling me how much of a loser I am.”

      “It's probably just a sibling thing,” Sehun offered, shrugging a bit.

 

      Junmyeon laughed once more, and Sehun couldn't believe how warm and inviting of a sound it was. Joohyun's family was literally perfection. That was all Sehun could figure.

      “Thank you for taking care of her,” Junmyeon continued. “I'm glad she's got you to look after her in these situations.”

      “I didn't do much,” Sehun muttered, flushing once more. He didn't think he'd blushed this much since he asked Joohyun out. “Any good boyfriend would have done the same thing, right?”

 

      Junmyeon smiled and laughed softly once more. Sehun's heart felt like it was doing flips in his chest. Why did this man he just met have to be so perfect already? Sehun was starting to wonder if he would survive if he became a permanent part of the family.

 

      Thankfully, before his mind could melt any further, Joohyun came back out, wearing a new set of dark jeans, her old clothing stuffed into the bag. She gave them both a small thumbs up.

      “All better?” Junmyeon asked.

      “All better!” She responded. Her brother nodded.

      “So where are you two headed?” He asked. Joohyun looked at her phone.

      “Well, we were going to go see a movie, but I don't know if we'll make it on time...”

      “I'll give you a lift,” Junmyeon offered. Sehun and Joohyun stared at him in surprise.

      “You don't have to do that!” She gasped. Her brother merely shook his head.

      “You'll miss your movie otherwise. Come on.”

 

      He motioned them over to his car. Joohyun looked at Sehun questioningly, as if she was asking if he was ok with it, and Sehun decided to lead the way. He grabbed her hand and the two walked over, getting into the back seat. The entire way to the movie theater, Joohyun and Junmyeon chatted away. They seemed very natural around one another, joking and teasing often. Even Sehun was able to join in the conversation easily.

 

      It was almost disappointing when they reached the movie theater and Junmyeon dropped them off, but as soon as Sehun and Joohyun were seated and the lights dimmed, any thoughts of Junmyeon were out of their minds. It was just them once more.

 

      After the movie, Sehun treated Joohyun to a nice, but inexpensive dinner. By the time they were done, Joohyun was starting to feel the aches and pains of her period, so Sehun decided it was time and walked her home. Joohyun thanked him once more for everything, and Sehun simply kissed her on the lips before heading home.

~*~

      A little over two weeks later, Sehun found himself at Joohyun's house. Her parents were out of town for the weekend and she had invited him over. She had mentioned dinner and spending the evening at her house so she wasn't alone, but he wasn't so naive to not understand where this was probably leading.

 

      He arrived after his shift ended in the early evening. The smell of dinner greeted him as Joohyun lead him into the house. She briefly told him that it would be ready in about half an hour before heading back into the kitchen. Sehun kicked off his shoes at the entrance and followed behind her.

 

      She had arranged the table neatly for two people and was buzzing around the kitchen, adding last minute ingredients and making sure everything tasted perfect. Sehun helped her put food on plates and took them to the table. Each time he walked by her, he playfully bumped into her with his hip, earning him a light smack on the shoulder in return. It was small moments like this that were Sehun's absolute favorites.

 

      They sat down to eat, and as expected, the food was absolutely wonderful. Sehun was beginning to think there wasn't a thing Joohyun couldn't do. Dinner was full of lighthearted chattering and happy glances with the occasional kiss or two.

 

      Following dinner, Joohyun gave Sehun a small tour of the house. The shelves were full of small picture frames that looked like they'd been hand crafted. Joohyun was in love with 'do-it-yourself' items and aesthetic, so naturally, her house was decorated with her own little creations. She'd even knit some small coasters and potholders for Sehun as a birthday present. Initially, she'd been really shy and nervous about the gift, fearing it would be too old fashioned, but Sehun loved them. They'd saved him from several instances of burned fingers and ruined counter tops as well.

 

      When they got to her room, Sehun wasn't surprised to find it relatively organized, overflowing with shades of pastel colors. Her desk was neat, lined with hand decorated picture frames and jars holding supplies and pencils. Sehun recognized one photo of Joohyun and her brother, Junmyeon. He picked it up and looked at it for a brief moment before moving on to the rest of the room.

 

      In one corner she had an array of tubs containing fabric and yarn. Sehun was amazed at just how much she had. Joohyun was really serious about her crafting and Sehun was fully supportive of it. She had a real talent and he wouldn't be surprised if she started selling some of her completed projects for an extra bit of cash.

 

      Joohyun plopped down on her bed and patted the spot next to her. Sehun sat down where she had indicated and smiled at her. His eyes wandered over the bed, stopping when he spotted a small cat plushy. He picked it up, noting that it was handmade as well. It looked like it had been crocheted, with a round stomach and pudgy cheeks. It was sewn together in such a way that it sat with its feet out in front of it, similar to a teddy bear. Even the paw pad details had been crocheted.

      “This is really cute,” he commented. “Did you make this too?”

      “Hm?” She asked, looking down at the cat. “Ah, no...I didn't. Junmyeon did actually.”

      “Junmyeon? Your brother!?” Sehun asked skeptically.

 

      He hadn't expected someone as attractive and mature as Junmyeon to have a hobby like making stuffed animals. Then again, he hardly knew the man, so maybe Junmyeon was nothing like his first impression. He was related to Joohyun, so it really wasn't a surprise that crafting talent ran in his blood as well.

 

      Sehun wanted to get to know more about Junmyeon. His mind seemed to skip over the small detail of how attractive he found the man. This was purely because he wanted to get to know more about Joohyun's family, and Junmyeon just happened to be part of it.

      “Yeah, he's really good at this kind of thing,” Joohyun explained. “He actually taught me a lot of what I know.”

      “Wow...You guys have some real talent in the family...Makes me wonder why you picked someone like me to date,” Sehun joked. Joohyun smiled and kissed him on the lips.

      “Because I liked you.”

 

      Sehun set the plushy down on the bed once more. He and Joohyun talked about a number of things for the next few hours, until their voices were starting to go hoarse. Sehun never seemed to run out of things to speak about with her, be it simple comments or deep discussions. They really did get along well.

 

      As throats became sore, words were replaced with kisses. As kisses became more passionate, gentle caresses and tight embraces were exchanged. Joohyun pulled at Sehun's shirt and he let her slide it off with no resistance. Her delicate fingers traced along the indentations of his muscles. Sehun's kisses turned to soft bites and sucks down her neck.

 

      Soon enough, they were bare, Sehun on top of Joohyun. He admired every curve of her body and how soft her skin was. Joohyun was flawless. Their kissing resumed and touching followed. Moans echoed through the room. Sehun was thankful they wouldn't have to worry about anyone coming home that evening.

 

      They paused long enough for Joohyun to slide a condom on. Their love making wasn't rough or rushed. Instead, Sehun took it slow, enjoying the way each of his thrusts had Joohyun arching against him and calling out his name. She only stopped when Sehun reconnected their lips, pressing his tongue into her mouth. Her legs wrapped around his waist and fingers tangled in his hair. Sehun's own hands traipsed along her body, finally settling on her thighs to lift her to a slightly different angle and thrust even deeper.

 

      Joohyun cried out as she came, digging her nails into Sehun's back. He followed after her, moaning into her shoulder. As they caught their breath, Sehun slid out, disposing of the condom in the nearby trash. Joohyun still seemed to be taking everything in. Sehun ran a hand along her cheek, brushing his fingers through her hair.

 

      She smiled shyly at him, and Sehun swore he'd never seen anything more beautiful. Her cheeks were flushed and she was practically glowing. She timidly reached for another condom and held it up, her eyes asking the question rather than her lips. Sehun could do nothing but laugh in response and comply. He would do anything for those eyes.

 

      Joohyun excitedly opened the package and soon enough, the new condom was on and she was lowering herself onto it, thighs on either side of Sehun. He let her take the lead this time, wanting to just bask in her glory. He knew that sounded cheesy, but he had always been a bit of a sap in this regard. He just didn't want to admit it.

 

      When they'd finally had their fill, they laid underneath Joohyun's comforter to snuggle. Sehun was spooning her, their naked bodies pressed together. Sehun's arm was wrapped around her side, their fingers interlaced in front of her. Joohyun put on a movie and the two lazily watched it, slowly dozing off. Sehun was fairly certain he hadn't been this happy and content with life in a long, long time.

 

~*~

      The next time Sehun came over to Joohyun's house, Junmyeon was there as well. Sehun wasn't necessarily surprised by that fact, after all Junmyeon was part of the family, but he certainly wasn't expecting it either. Joohyun had briefly explained that she wanted Sehun and Junmyeon to get to know each other better now that they had been officially introduced.

 

      Watching Joohyun and Junmyeon together, cooking and chatting, was possibly the most overwhelming experience ever for Sehun. One family should not have such attractive people in it. Sehun was starting to wonder if their parents had sold their souls to the devil to get such gorgeous children. Obviously he never posed this theory to Joohyun, but secretly he believed it, just a little bit.

 

      Junmyeon was a little quieter than Joohyun. Still more talkative than Sehun, but he wasn't constantly chattering away, not that Joohyun did that either. Sehun just couldn't help but find himself constantly paying attention to the instances in which Junmyeon did talk. There was something about his voice that was really soft and enticing. Perhaps 'welcoming' would be the better word to describe it, but Sehun would be lying if he said he wasn't drawn to his voice either.

 

      Dinner was mostly full of small talk. Junmyeon asked them the standard questions about their relationship like how they met and such. Sehun couldn't stop staring at him the entire time. Even the way Junmyeon held his utensils seemed to have Sehun in awe. What was it about the older man that got Sehun so shaken up?

 

      When speaking about his own life, Junmyeon kept things very brief and vague. He swore that his job was boring and dry and that his personal and love lives were even drier. Instead, Junmyeon wanted to hear more about Sehun and Joohyun, though mostly Sehun because he'd known Joohyun her entire life. Sehun didn't really have many exciting things to say either. He simply worked in a small cafe, was saving for college, had the picture perfect girlfriend, bummed around his apartment in his free time, and watched  _way_  too many movies. Junmyeon still seemed to find that fascinating though.

 

      Following dinner, the three curled up on the couch to watch yet another movie. Sehun really wasn't exaggerating when he said he watched too many movies. He was seated in between Joohyun and Junmyeon, and it felt like he was a blob of anxiety sandwiched in between perfection. Sehun really shouldn't have been that nervous, but something about Joohyun and Junmyeon together just got to him. At least, that's what he tried to tell himself.

 

      As the movie started, Sehun saw movement on his right and glanced over. Junmyeon had gotten off the couch to go grab something. He came back with a pack of several knitting needles and some yarn. He tossed one of the yarn balls to Joohyun and she caught it with ease. After he handed her a set of knitting needles and sat down. Soon, both of them were knitting on either side of Sehun.

 

      Now he just felt incredibly awkward. He found it endearing that Joohyun and her brother basically just knitted together, even if it was seen as a grandparent's activity. He was just sitting there doing nothing though. He almost wished he hadn't eaten dinner so that he could make some popcorn and have something to do.

 

      About halfway through the movie, Joohyun leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. She grabbed another ball of yarn and held it up to him. Sehun looked at it curiously.

      “Do you wanna try?” She asked.

      “Uh...Sure...”

 

      Sehun had never been particularly keen on learning how to knit, but he knew it was important to Joohyun and it would make her happy if he took an interest in it or at least gave it a try. If nothing else, it would give Sehun something to do during the movie. What was the worst that could happen after all?

 

      Soon enough, Joohyun had helped Sehun get several chains on his needle and was teaching him the basic knit stitch. He was amazed at how fast Joohyun and Junmyeon could knit. It took him forever just to do one stitch, between poking it through the loop and wrapping the yarn around the needle then pulling it back through. He managed to lose a stitch or two in the process as well and had to start all over. Perhaps he really wasn't meant for the crafting world.

 

      The movie seemed to be long forgotten as Sehun struggled with his needles and yarn. Joohyun couldn't stop giggling at him, but she helped him every time she could tell he was stuck. Even Junmyeon started pitching in tips. At one point, Sehun accidentally looped the yarn around the needle twice and ended up with an extra stitch. He looked at it in a mixture of frustration and exasperation. Two hands reached over and grabbed the needles from him and Sehun flushed. They weren't Joohyun's hands, but something about them was even more warm and gentle.

      “Let me see,” Junmyeon whispered softly.

 

      He undid a few stitches and fixed the mistake Sehun had made, then handed it back to him. For the rest of the time, Junmyeon focused on coaching Sehun rather than working on his own piece. Sehun could feel his cheeks heat up every time Junmyeon's breath tickled at his ear or his fingers brushed across Sehun's. There was no way this reaction was normal. It had to be because he didn't know Junmyeon that well yet.

 

      Eventually, Joohyun joined in, so all of the attention was on Sehun. He'd given up trying to save his image at this point and was just asking for help every step of the way now. Joohyun and Junmyeon were practically chanting directions at him. By the time the movie credits were rolling, Sehun finally had a somewhat decent hang of knitting, with guidance anyway. He was almost certain he would never be able to do this on his own though.

 

      Sehun glanced at the time and was surprised that it was already so late. He'd been concentrating too much. He wanted to stay longer, but he would have to go to work in the morning, and he needed the rest. Joohyun seemed disappointed, but she understood where he was coming from.

 

      Sehun helped Junmyeon and Joohyun pack up the yarn. They said they'd keep his progress in case he wanted to work more, but Sehun really doubted he'd ever be able to do anything more with it. Joohyun saw him to the door and they shared a few kisses with each other. Since Junmyeon had been with them the entire time, Sehun realized he hadn't really talked to Joohyun alone or even kissed her. Somehow, the evening felt like a blur and his mind was frazzled. It was probably just because he wasn't used to Junmyeon and he was still shy, despite the fact that Sehun wasn't even shy by nature. Junmyeon was his girlfriend's brother. It made sense to be nervous around him, right?

 

      Sehun hugged Joohyun once more and backed away. To his surprise, Junmyeon stepped out as well, kissing Joohyun on the top of the head in passing and mumbling something about coming by again in a few days. Sehun suddenly felt really bad for leaving Joohyun all alone, but it couldn't be helped.

 

      When Joohyun had shut the door, Sehun turned to Junmyeon and cleared his throat awkwardly. Why did he feel so anxious around the man?

      “Did you want me to give you a ride home?” Junmyeon asked.

      “Ah, no, it's fine...”

      “You have work tomorrow, right? You'd get home sooner since I have a car. It's really not that big of a deal.”

      “Alright...”

 

      Junmyeon lead Sehun over to his car and the two got in. Sehun sat in the passenger's seat, staring out the window silently as Junmyeon started to drive. The only time he would really speak up was when the other man asked him for directions. Sehun felt like his cheeks were on fire. Why did he feel this way around Junmyeon? He hadn't even been this nervous when he first started pursuing Joohyun.

 

      Thankfully, Junmyeon didn't seem to mind the silence. Instead, he put on some music to lighten the mood. Sehun was surprised when Junmyeon started singing along. He had a really nice voice, one that Sehun could get used to hearing. It was calming his frazzled nerves if nothing else. Sehun couldn't help but hum along as well.

 

      They reached Sehun's apartment faster than he would have liked. Sehun sighed and reached for the door handle, but Junmyeon spoke up suddenly.

      “Hey, would you like to exchange numbers?” He asked.

      “What?”

      “Phone numbers. Just so we can keep in contact. I mean, you are dating my sister. It could come in handy someday, you know? Especially if we all end up hanging out again or you two need help with something.”

      “Oh, yeah...Sure.”

 

      Junmyeon pulled out his phone and they did the exchange. Sehun stared at his phone's screen blankly for a moment before realizing it was actually time for him to get out of the car now. He cleared his throat and opened the door, stepping outside.

      “Thanks for the ride...” He mumbled.

      “Of course,” Junmyeon answered happily. “I hope I'll see you around again soon.”

      “Yeah. Same.”

 

      Sehun waved and shut the door, then watched as Junmyeon drove away. He let out a shaky sigh, placing his hands on his cheeks. Why on earth were they so flushed? Was he actually getting sick? Sehun didn't want to admit it, but Junmyeon had really shaken him up.

 

~*~

      Sehun's mind still seemed to be fried the following day. He was in a total daze for most of work. He wanted to blame it on the fact that he'd spent too much brain power on knitting, but he knew that was just a ridiculous lie. The real reason was because he couldn't stop thinking about Junmyeon.

 

      He rubbed his hands up and down his cheeks, groaning and trying to focus on something else. He felt someone nudge his shoulder gently and he looked over to see Seulgi starting at him worriedly.

      “You ok?” She asked gently.

      “I don't know...”

      “Did the date go badly? Did you and Joohyun fight?” She rapid-fired. Sehun sighed and shook his head.

      “No, of course not. I just...met her brother...”

      “Oh, Junmyeon? Why's that got you down? He's a good guy.”

      “Yeah, I know he is,” Sehun mumbled. That was actually most of the problem. “I guess I'm just nervous around him still...I mean, I'm dating his little sister and all...”

      “Well, I don't think you'll have to worry about much,” Seulgi comforted. “Junmyeon is a really sweet guy. If he hasn't already taken a liking to you, he will really soon. I don't think it's possible for him to hate someone without having a  _really_ legitimate reason to.”

      “That's good, I guess...”

      “I swear, if he wasn't gay, I'd date him,” Seulgi muttered quietly, leaning on the counter and placing her hands on her cheeks.

      “He's gay?” Sehun asked, somewhat surprised.

      “Hm? Oh, you didn't know? He's pretty open about it so I would have figured he or Joohyun would have told you...Does that bother you?”

      “No, not at all,” Sehun shrugged. “I can appreciate a hot man myself, so...” That was  _exactly_  the problem. Seulgi laughed and rolled her eyes.

      “No doing that while you're dating Joohyun, alright?”

      “Of course not!”

 

      What Sehun was feeling right now was just a mixture of shock, nerves, and physical attraction. It was nothing like what he felt for Joohyun. He couldn't even fathom cheating on her. She was so gentle and kind. He could never do anything to hurt her, let alone betray her trust like that.

 

      Seulgi smiled and laughed, reaching up to ruffle his hair. She hadn't really settled his nerves at all, in fact the new information she'd provided made him even more nervous. Still, she was one of his closest friends and it was nice to have her there to talk to, even if nothing was really resolved. Sehun could only hope that he would calm down with time as he got to know Junmyeon more.

 

      Time went on and Sehun found himself interacting more and more with Junmyeon. The man wasn't always there, in fact there were plenty of times when it was just Joohyun and Sehun. Those were by far the most relaxing days. Sehun even met her parents during one such occasion, and wasn't remotely fazed or nervous. It was only the days when Junmyeon was there that he found his heart beating faster and his tongue stumbling over words.

 

      Despite all of this, somehow Sehun had the bright idea of inviting Junmyeon to the movies to see a new action thriller. He should have invited Joohyun. He knew she would go with him if he did. So why on earth had his fingers sent the text to Junmyeon? Sehun was starting to think he'd completely lost it.

 

      He almost screamed when Junmyeon responded later that evening saying he would go. Sehun knew he should invite Joohyun as well. That would be the right thing to do as her boyfriend, but part of him honestly didn't want to. Going alone with Junmyeon almost felt like he was stabbing her in the back, but he wasn't right? It was just a movie after all. Sehun was thinking way too much about this. He needed to just stop. The damage was done. He was going to the movies with Junmyeon and not Joohyun.

 

      That was how he found himself standing in line with the older man to buy tickets a week later. Junmyeon was dressed in somewhat tight jeans and a plain shirt and jacket. They were simple, but still relatively stylish. Sehun was almost certain that Junmyeon could go into a modeling career if he really wanted to. Why was he thinking about that though?

 

      Sehun shook his head, earning a curious glance from Junmyeon. Thankfully, before the latter could ask about it, it was their turn to buy tickets. By the time they were in the concessions line, Junmyeon seemed to have moved on to chatting with Sehun about the movie they were about to see. From what Sehun gathered, Junmyeon was fairly interested in movies, but his work often kept him busy or left him exhausted, so he never really made an effort to go out and see them. It seemed Junmyeon didn't have much of a social life as a result either. Though he swore that was also because he preferred to be home resting than out drinking with work acquaintances.

 

      They bought a giant tub of popcorn and two drinks that, despite being medium, were absolutely massive. They were both going to need to rush to the bathroom after the movie, Sehun could already tell. They headed into the dark theater and grabbed seats around the middle of the room. After that, it was just a matter of sitting through ads while they waited for the movie to start.

 

      As they grabbed at popcorn, their hands would occasionally brush from time to time. Sehun jumped the first few times it happened and apologized, earning that wonderful, warm smile from Junmyeon. After a while though, he finally got used to it. Perhaps this would help him calm down around Junmyeon after all. Maybe this was a good thing.

 

      The movie began and soon they were engrossed in the plot. Sehun couldn't help but still glance at Junmyeon every so often to see how he was reacting. His eyes were wide, glued unblinkingly to the screen. Sehun couldn't help but smile each time he noticed Junmyeon shoveling more popcorn into his mouth as something intense happened on the screen. He wondered if that was his coping method to get through rough patches in the movie. If Sehun brought him to a horror movie, he wondered if Junmyeon would gain 5 pounds in one sitting from all the popcorn he'd consume. He couldn't help but giggle at the thought. Thankfully, Junmyeon was too captivated by the film to notice. Sehun had long since stopped paying close attention to it. Instead, his mind was unabashedly revolving around thoughts of the man sitting next to him.

 

      Following the movie, Sehun and Junmyeon bolted to the bathroom, as the former had predicted. When they were done, Sehun decided they might as well grab a light dinner somewhere. Junmyeon was in favor of that as well. Somehow, despite shoveling popcorn into their mouths for a little over two hours, they still wanted more food.

 

      They headed to a small restaurant and sat at a table near the window. The menu wasn't too expensive thankfully, and neither wanted to eat a lot of food, so they both settled on appetizers rather than an actual meal. As the waitress walked off with their order, Junmyeon leaned his elbows on the table and sighed.

      “Thanks for inviting me out, Sehun. I really enjoyed it.”

      “Yeah, of course. Anytime,” the other responded, trying to ignore the weird feeling in his chest as he saw that same old smile grace Junmyeon's face.

      “I don't normally go out like this, but you're really relaxing to be around. Joohyun's lucky to have you.”

      “Ah, yeah...” Sehun mumbled.

 

      Joohyun. He had  _completely_ forgotten about her. How was that even possible? He supposed it was because he wasn't with her and he didn't  _always_  think about her, but still, he was practically ogling over Junmyeon. He was quite shamelessly ogling over him actually. Shouldn't he have thought about Joohyun much earlier and stopped himself? Shouldn't he feel bad about practically drooling over the other man in the first place? So why did he feel worse for realizing that he needed to stop thinking about Junmyeon this way? It was more upsetting to realize he had to stop than it was to realize he was having these thoughts in the first place.

 

      Junmyeon seemed to be completely oblivious to his internal dilemma at least. He took a sip out of his straw and smiled bashfully at Sehun, as if he were flustered for a split second. Then again, maybe Sehun imagined it or was projecting.

      “So...You and Joohyun have been dating for half a year now, right?”

      “Yeah...”

      “Everything still sailing smoothly?”

      “Of course,” Sehun answered automatically. He couldn't exactly say 'not anymore thanks to you.'

      “You can give me the dirt, you know,” he joked, laughing a bit at the end. “I'm sure she's got some bad habits that drive you nuts.”

      “You just want fuel to tease her with, don't you?” Sehun deadpanned, smirking a bit.

      “Damn, figured me out,” the older man shrugged. Sehun couldn't help but laugh.

      “She's great, really.”

      “I'm really glad you think that way.”

 

      Sehun felt like he was being jokingly poked in the chest with a knife, and he wasn't quite sure why anymore. It could have been the fact that he felt guilty for having these thoughts behind Joohyun's back, or it could have even been heartburn from all the junk food. It was probably because Junmyeon seemed enamored with their relationship though. Sehun didn't really want to admit it, but he would have liked it if Junmyeon had seemed at least a little against them dating, or even a little jealous. He was afraid to think about why he felt that way though.

 

      Their food arrived shortly after and the discussion shifted to thoughts on the movie. Sehun found that even his opinions seemed to line up well with Junmyeon. He had always thought he and Joohyun were compatible, but it seemed he was even more so with her older brother. That line of thinking wasn't going to do him any good, so he forced himself to stop.

 

      Following dinner, Junmyeon drove Sehun home once more. This time, he didn't really need to ask for directions since he knew where it was. Sehun was tired from a long day of emotional turmoil, so he once again remained silent in the passenger seat. Junmyeon turned on music once more and Sehun closed his eyes, listening to the other man's borderline angelic voice for the entire ride home. Sehun was beyond reluctant to leave when they arrived at his apartment. Junmyeon promised they would go out again sometime though, and that left Sehun both relieved and nervous at the same time.

 

      As Sehun watched Junmyeon drive off, the happy daze he had been in all day seemed to wear off and he came back to his senses. There was no way Junmyeon was a good influence. He was by far the worst, in fact. Sehun really needed to minimize the amount of time he spent with the man. He really didn't think his heart would survive otherwise.

 

~*~

      The next time Sehun met up with Joohyun, he decided to come clean about going to see the movie with Junmyeon. He left out all the strange feelings he'd had though. Nobody needed to know about those. To his surprise, she actually wasn't bothered at all. On the contrary, she was really happy. In her eyes, that just meant Sehun was becoming closer to the family. She really was too good and trusting of him.

 

      Junmyeon's work seemed to keep him busy most days, so Sehun didn't have to worry about more invitations to see him. He tried his hardest to keep contact with Junmyeon to a minimum. The only time he did see him was when Junmyeon came over and stayed with both Joohyun and Sehun.

 

      The times when Junmyeon wasn't there were great. Sehun and Joohyun got along just as well as always. When her parents were gone, they would stay at each other's houses, and they were the perfect couple. Even their sex life prospered. When Junmyeon was over at Joohyun's house though, Sehun could never quite concentrate. At least, not on Joohyun.

 

      His mind was constantly wrapped around Junmyeon. Ever since they'd gone to the movies together, they had broken the awkward wall between them. It was no longer stressful for Sehun to talk to Junmyeon. In fact, it came so naturally, talking to Joohyun was starting to feel hard in comparison. The biggest thing that stressed Sehun out was the fact that his relationship felt so different with Junmyeon around. He was no longer the perfect boyfriend doting on his girlfriend. He was someone completely different, and he was afraid to figure out just who that person was. Avoidance was always easier than confrontation.

 

      So Sehun continued to ignore Junmyeon with all his might. When the man finally did have some free time one evening and invited Sehun out, the latter decided to decline, saying he was busy. It was a complete lie, but Junmyeon didn't need to know. Sehun took a deep breath after declining the invite via text and stared at a picture on his desk of him and Joohyun. It was much better this way. He had to keep his priorities straight and not get lost in a fantasy.


	2. Chapter 2

     The next time he went on a date with Joohyun, she wanted to go shopping for some new clothes as well as art supplies. Sehun didn't really mind following her around as she shopped. Sometimes he would even grab a couple of things he needed as well. This particular trip was different though. Rather than thinking about what would look good on himself or Joohyun, all he could think about was what would look good on Junmyeon.

 

     He genuinely tried not to think about it, but each time he passed a really nice sweater or jacket, thoughts of Junmyeon wearing it flooded his mind. He especially wondered how Junmyeon would look in light pink. Somehow, he had a feeling that he would look great in it. It seemed like a color that suited his personality, and Sehun meant that in the fondest and most complementary way.

 

     Finally, Joohyun finished shopping for clothes, no thanks to Sehun's poor decision skills and lack of concentration, and they headed to the craft store. If Sehun thought searching for clothes was reminding him too much of Junmyeon, being in the yarn section at a craft store was a whole new level.

 

     Joohyun was looking for a nice pastel-colored yarn in order to knit Seulgi a scarf, and for some reason, she thought Sehun would be able to help her choose between mint green and lavender. They both looked nice, and Sehun wasn't sure which one would suit Seulgi better, so Joohyun stood there debating for what felt like an eternity.

 

     During that time, Sehun's eyes scanned the aisle, taking in all the different types of yarn. Some were extremely fuzzy, and Sehun bet those would make the most comfortable scarves or blankets. Would Junmyeon wear a scarf made out of that? Maybe if it was a neutral color, or perhaps a dark blue. Sehun could probably hide a million different mistakes with one of the fuzzier yarns too. That would probably be the only way he could ever complete a scarf.

 

     Was he actually thinking about trying knitting again for Junmyeon? What was going on? He should be thinking about knitting a scarf for Joohyun, if anyone. He shouldn't be thinking about knitting a scarf at all, actually. He sucked at it. Why was his head so muddled these days? He wished he could just go back to the days before he knew Joohyun's brother existed.

 

     Finally, Joohyun decided on mint green and they left the store, much to Sehun's relief. He figured mint green would suit Seulgi more than lavender anyway. Lavender was Joohyun's color. And Sehun was starting to think that pastel pink wouldn't look too bad on Junmyeon.

 

~*~

     It was getting exhausting finding excuses not to see Junmyeon, and Sehun was getting to the point where he really didn't want to anymore. Junmyeon sometimes seemed reluctant to talk to him when he came over to visit Joohyun, and the man seemed to be coming less and less. Sehun was starting to feel like he was unintentionally causing Joohyun and Junmyeon to grow apart, and he couldn't have that. He was probably just being extremely paranoid, but still, if he could 'patch' things up with Junmyeon, he would feel better.

 

     Sehun was particularly surprised when he received a text from Junmyeon a few days later while he was working in the cafe. It wasn't anything big, not even going to the movies or dinner. Junmyeon was simply asking if he would like to come over and hang out. The thought of going directly to Junmyeon's house alone was actually far more nerve wracking though.

 

     Seulgi saw him staring at his phone in a complete daze and she gently nudged his shoulder, looking at him worriedly.

     “Everything ok?” She asked.

     “Huh? Uh, yeah...Just Junmyeon...”

     “Oh really? What's up?” She asked perkily. Sehun forced a smile.

     “He just wanted to hang out.”

     “Joohyun mentioned you two seemed to be getting along well. Guess she wasn't joking.”

     “Yeah. He's a pretty cool guy,” Sehun mumbled.

     “Well, your shift ends in an hour, so you could probably go see him, right?”

     “Yeah, probably.”

 

     He let out a deep sigh and texted Junmyeon back, letting him know he'd be getting off work in an hour and he was free to hang out. Junmyeon replied saying he would pick Sehun up at the cafe, and Sehun couldn't help but blush slightly. He really wasn't enjoying the way his body and mind always reacted to Junmyeon.

 

     Work seemed to fly by after that, much to his dismay. He hung up his apron and slid on his thick jacket, since the autumn breeze had started to turn into icy, winter wind. He stepped outside and immediately spotted Junmyeon's car. He was surprised to find Junmyeon sitting on the front of it, waiting for him. Sehun walked over quickly, his eyes wide as he noted Junmyeon's somewhat red nose. Had he been waiting long?

     “You didn't have to sit out here,” Sehun mumbled. “You could have waited in the car or come inside...”

     “It's fine,” Junmyeon said gently in response, getting to his feet. He had the same warm smile that melted every fiber of Sehun's being. “I've been inside all day and the fresh air was really nice.”

     “Isn't it cold though...?”

     “Sometimes the cold isn't that bad,” Junmyeon murmured. He smiled a little wider this time. “Should we get going?”

     “Yeah!”

 

     Silent car rides seemed to be a recurrence between the two. They weren't _actually_ silent, since Junmyeon was almost always singing something and Sehun was humming along quietly, but there were never any words exchanged between the two. It was a calm that Sehun needed and genuinely loved. Even when they weren't conversing with each other, he felt at ease with Junmyeon.

 

     They reached Junmyeon's apartment in about 20 minutes. It was fairly large, on the higher end of quality as far as apartments went. Sehun was quite impressed, though it made sense, given Junmyeon was a working man with decent pay. The place seemed a little big for just one person though.

 

     Junmyeon made a simple meal for the two of them. Sehun helped him cook, and he realized that Joohyun is the better cook of the two. Junmyeon was still much better than Sehun though, so it felt more like he was messing things up rather than helping. They eventually managed to make some semblance of a meal and ate it at Junmyeon's small dining table, happily chatting away. It was like all of Sehun's attempts to distance himself had meant nothing. They got along just as well as they always had.

 

     After dinner, Junmyeon showed Sehun around. The apartment had an overall chic, modern style and atmosphere to it. Despite all of that, Sehun found an alarming amount of small crocheted stuffed animals spread throughout the house. He couldn't help but find it endearing.

 

     They finally settled on Junmyeon's couch to watch a movie. Surprise, surprise. That was literally the only thing Sehun could do competently these days. Not unexpectedly, Junmyeon grabbed a ball of yarn as the movie started up and began working on something. He wasn't knitting this time, but crocheting. Sehun watched in awe as his fingers moved at an alarming speed, crocheting the beginning of a sphere. Sehun leaned over and looked at it curiously.

     “What are you making?”

     “Hm? Oh this...? I'm, uh...making a dog,” Junmyeon muttered shyly. Sehun nodded, looking impressed.

     “You were the one that made Joohyun's cat plushy, right? It's really good. You're really talented.” Junmyeon flushed this time and rubbed his nose.

     “Thanks...I really like to make them, you know? But it's not exactly something I boast about...Most people would harass me about making cute stuffed animals rather than having a manlier hobby.”

     “Well, they're pieces of shit who are probably too uncoordinated to even fathom making something like that, so just ignore them,” Sehun stated bluntly. Junmyeon laughed and ruffled Sehun's hair, startling the younger.

     “You really are something, Sehun! I wish I had half the confidence you have...”

     “I'm really not that confident,” Sehun sighed. “Probably just stupid and young.”

     “Still...You've got a good head on your shoulders and you've always been really open minded in the time that I've known you. It's a nice change. I wish I could meet more people like you...”  
     “What do you mean?”

     “Well, strange hobbies aside, I'm gay,” Junmyeon said softly. “It took a couple years for me to really come to terms with that fact, and after that, I had to tell everyone who was close to me, you know? I told Joohyun first actually.”

     “Oh really? And what did she say?”

     “She said that it didn't make me any different than I was before and not to be afraid. She later helped me come out to our parents. Thankfully, they took it just as well as she had.”

     “That's good,” Sehun said quietly. He remembered coming out as bi to his parents, and it was a pretty nerve wracking experience.

     “But even with my family supporting me, it's been hard. I've always been afraid to be in a committed relationship...I thought I'd finally found someone too. We were supposed to move into this apartment about a year ago, but he backed out. Turns out, he'd been cheating on me...He told me I was embarrassing and a pushover...and that there were better fucks out there...”

     “Junmyeon...”

     “After that, my confidence was pretty low. Joohyun made me start seeing her as often as I could because she was worried about me. I had a few really rough months.”

     “That was before she and I were dating,” Sehun stated. “Otherwise I probably would have met you a lot sooner...”

     “Yeah. I finally recovered and things more or less went back to normal. I worked, I went home, I ate, I crocheted to relieve stress, I went to bed. I've actually started to run out of people to give the plushies to, which is why there are so many here.”

     “Is that why you don't go out often?”

     “Well, I also don't really like to be with coworkers longer than work hours, and I don't have a lot of friends otherwise. So staying home just became the natural thing to do. If I was lonely, I'd go see Joohyun. She and I have similar hobbies thankfully, so it's easy for us to spend time together.”

     “I'm glad she's there for you,” Sehun said softly, pride welling in his chest. Joohyun really was a wonderful person.

     “Same. And it's been really good meeting you. I'm really thankful we could become friends. To be honest, I was a little anxious about inviting you over, but I'm glad I did...”

 

     Sehun's heart clenched at his words. Friends. That's what they were. He shouldn't feel disappointed. He shouldn't want more. It was wrong and unfair to Joohyun. Being friends with Junmyeon was already an honor in and of itself. He needed to convince himself to just leave it at that.

     “I'm really glad we could become friends too,” Sehun responded. “You're really easy to be around and I think you're amazing. I wish I could do half the things you and Joohyun can do.”

     “Really?”

     “Yeah. And as for that bastard, good riddance. He didn't deserve you in the first place. You can do much better, and you will. Someday, you'll find the person who will love you unconditionally. So until then, you gotta keep holding on, ok?”

     “Y-Yeah...” Junmyeon muttered, looking away. Sehun could tell he was flustered. “Thanks...”

 

     The younger smiled and nodded. He glanced at the movie, noticing they'd talked through the first 15 minutes. He honestly didn't really care about watching it. He was much too concerned about Junmyeon and making sure he was ok. Sehun jumped slightly when he felt Junmyeon lean on his shoulder.

     “I'm really thankful for this, Sehun...You're a great guy. Joohyun is so lucky to have you...”

 

     Sehun couldn't stand how sad and broken Junmyeon sounded, particularly as he spoke the last sentence. Maybe he was projecting his own disappointment on Junmyeon. All Sehun wanted was to cheer him up somehow. Junmyeon seemed to recover quickly on his own though. The man sat up and wiped at his eyes slightly, then got up and grabbed another ball of yarn. He came back and held it up to Sehun, smiling the same old grin.

     “You know, crocheting is a little easier than knitting. Want to give it a try?”

 

     Sehun couldn't find it in him to say no. Junmyeon sat down beside him and started teaching him the different knots. Sehun caught on much faster and soon enough, he was crocheting a nice little square. He didn't know what he would even do with it, but Junmyeon suggested turning it into a potholder. It was a better idea than anything Sehun had thought of.

 

     Once again, the movie was merely background noise as the two worked on their projects. Sehun checked his phone at one point and groaned when he realized it was really late and he had a morning shift. He hadn't finished his potholder yet either. Junmyeon simply laughed and told him he'd hold onto it until the next time Sehun came over and he could finish it then. After that, they packed up and got in the car so Junmyeon could take him back home.

 

     Sehun was far more reluctant to get out when they pulled up to his apartment. He wanted to blame it on the cold weather, so he could have an excuse to stay in the car with Junmyeon just a little longer, but ultimately, he knew he'd overstayed his time in paradise and he needed to go. He waved goodbye and walked away with another promise of next time. He was already looking forward to it.

 

~*~

     Ever since that night at Junmyeon's house, Sehun wasn't able to get the man out of his mind. Initially, he thought it might be sympathy, but as he sat on it more and more, he realized it was much more than that. It was longing. He longed to be with Junmyeon more often than he did Joohyun. He felt bad about it, but he couldn't help being drawn to the other man. He was all Junmyeon had too.

 

     The times when Sehun and Junmyeon went out together gradually increased. Sehun still saw Joohyun just as much as he had before. Nothing had really changed between them, although Sehun sometimes noticed Joohyun would go quite or look like she wanted to talk about something. Whenever he asked her about it though, she always said it was nothing. It didn't bode well with him, but he wasn't going to force her to talk about it if she didn't want to.

 

     Instead, he carried on, doing just what he'd done before. He would visit both Joohyun and Junmyeon together as well as individually. Sometimes, when Junmyeon was with them, Joohyun would retreat into her shell slightly, and it would take some coaxing from both Sehun and Junmyeon to get her to go back to her usual bubbly self. Was she starting to become uncomfortable when Junmyeon was around? Was she jealous?

 

     Sehun figured if that was the case, they should keep their meetings between the three of them to a minimum. That way, he could focus his attention on Joohyun completely. That was how it should be anyway.

 

     Still, he would see Junmyeon as well. They were good friends by then, and Sehun refused to cut that off completely. He cared way too much for the other man. And that should have been the very first warning sign.

 

~*~

     Sehun was over at Junmyeon's house again to watch another movie. This time they actually planned to pay attention to it though. Shortly before playing the film, Junmyeon had helped Sehun finish his extremely simple and somewhat sloppy potholder, so they could set the yarn aside. The movie they were watching was a romantic comedy. Sehun had no trouble telling Junmyeon in detail just how much he loved that genre. He didn't linger on the fact that he couldn't even admit that to Joohyun.

 

     They were seated next to each other on the couch, feet resting on pillows above the coffee table in front of them. Sehun was shivering slightly, the chill of winter fully present now. Even with Junmyeon's heater on, Sehun still found himself cold. The other man noticed and paused the movie long enough to get a blanket and drape it over them.

 

     Sehun grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around his body, snuggling closer to Junmyeon so the other man could be fully covered by it as well. Sehun sighed contentedly, noting that Junmyeon was much warmer than the blanket above them. He was warmer than Joohyun as well. He knew it was wrong to compare them, but it was getting harder to control his mind. Anything and everything seemed to lead back to Junmyeon.

 

     Halfway through the movie, Sehun felt Junmyeon's arm slide behind his back. Soon, the man's hand was planted softly on Sehun's waist, fingers timidly rubbing circles onto just barely exposed skin. The younger's eyes widened momentarily and his heart skipped a beat. There was no way this was something that happened between two friends. This was not the least bit platonic. Sehun knew this. He _knew_ this.

 

     So why didn't he pull away? Why didn't he do anything to stop it? He just snuggled closer, leaning his head on Junmyeon's shoulder. To make matters even worse, he wrapped his arm around Junmyeon's torso, pressing himself closer. What on earth was he doing? It was like he didn't even recognize the person he'd become. This just felt so right.

 

     They stayed like this for the remainder of the film. Even when the credits had long since finished rolling, they stayed cuddled up with each other, just talking about anything and everything. But not about Joohyun. She was a thought that could not be had in good conscience. A taboo. Sehun genuinely didn't _want_ to think about her. He didn't want to think about how guilty he would feel the next day or what he was going to do from now on. All he wanted to think about was being wrapped up in Junmyeon's arms. All he _could_ think about was the man right beside him.

 

~*~

     Sehun couldn't bring himself to tell Joohyun about anything that had happened with Junmyeon. Rather, he kept it all cooped inside, acting as if it never happened. He knew it was wrong and that he needed to talk things through with her. Honesty was the best policy after all. He was afraid to be honest with even himself though. He had a feeling everything would crumble down if he was.

 

     So instead he continued to ignore the problem. Joohyun seemed increasingly more distant each time she and Sehun went on a date. Sometimes she asked Sehun if he loved her and he would always answer with the same 'of course.' Sehun could tell she believed it less and less each time. He was starting to believe it less and less as well. He did love Joohyun though. The problem was he was falling so much more for Junmyeon. Why couldn't he make himself stop?

 

     On one particular date, Sehun and Joohyun were over at his apartment. He'd made her dinner, and the entire time Joohyun seemed entranced by his haphazardly made potholder. Sehun realized he'd never told her that he'd been over to Junmyeon's and the latter had taught him how to crochet. Sehun kept his explanation as brief as possible. Talking about visits to Junmyeon's house was treading dangerous territory enough as it was.

 

     Joohyun seemed to take the information with indifference, but for the rest of the night, she was just a bit more distant. Their conversations were forced and uncomfortable. The long gaps of silence in between words was unnerving and deafening. Sehun ultimately decided to put on a movie just to have some sort of noise in the room and something to distract him from one of the most painful dates of his life.

 

     The lights in the room were dim and the mood would have been perfect were it not for the fact that Joohyun and Sehun were anything but ok. Sehun was thankful that Joohyun wouldn't be spending the night at his place. It had been quite some time since either of them had spent the night over at the other's house actually.

 

     About halfway through the movie, Joohyun shifted her position rather drastically. She had been sitting beside Sehun, but soon enough, she was on his lap, a knee on either side of his waist. Sehun stared up at her since she was blocking his view of the TV. Joohyun leaned down and connected their lips, kissing Sehun as passionately as she could. He kissed her back, but his usual vigor wasn't there.

 

     She rocked her hips downward, brushing against Sehun's crotch and he gasped slightly. He felt horrible, but he really didn't want to do this. He didn't think he had a clear enough mind to have sex with her, and he knew that was where she was going with this. He placed his hands on her hips and pushed her away gently, looking up at her tiredly.

     “Not today,” he whispered.

 

     She bit her lip, but nodded nonetheless. She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, burying her face in his neck. Sehun sighed and hugged her back. Joohyun was always so understanding and good to him. Sehun genuinely wished he could give her what she wanted, but he just didn't think he had it in him today. Though, it was probably more than just 'today.'

 

     Joohyun pulled away with a sigh and resumed her place at his side. Sehun stared at the TV, but his eyes couldn't focus on a single image. He vaguely saw Joohyun wiping at her face with the end of her sleeve, but he didn't turn to look at her. He didn't need to in order to know that she was wiping away tears. She eventually snuggled up to him and he wrapped his arm around her waist. He hated the fact that all he could think about was how Joohyun wasn't quite as warm as Junmyeon, and how she was just a bit too thin to feel right in his arms.

 

     Joohyun left his house later that evening, smiling weakly and kissing him on the cheek. She hugged him tightly, as if desperate to hold on to him for as long as she could. When she let go, she waved goodbye, telling him she loved him. Sehun told her he loved her back, but the words felt funny on his tongue. As he watched her walk away, he breathed a sigh of relief. That should have been the second warning.

 

~*~

     December rolled in before anyone knew it. Soon enough, the streets were decorated with lights and other Christmas frill, and every store was playing nothing but Christmas music. That included the small cafe that Sehun worked in. They also had to introduce several seasonal drinks and baked goods, so overall, it was rather stressful.

 

     Sehun had been looking forward to Christmas a few months ago. He had planned on spending the evening with Joohyun and taking her on the dream date, complete with an amazing present. Now, he was dreading the whole event. He still had to figure out what to give her as a gift, and with how their recent dates had been going, he didn't have high hopes of Christmas being any better.

 

     The only thing Sehun could really, genuinely look forward to was seeing Junmyeon sometime over the holiday. The man had been really busy with work recently and he was taking a much needed vacation over Christmas and New Years. There was no way Sehun wasn't going to see him sometime during that break. His sanity depended on it.

 

     He sighed and leaned on the counter in the cafe, staring off into space. He was planning to go shopping for both Joohyun's and Junmyeon's presents once his shift ended, but he was dreading that just as much as he dreaded work. He felt the same gentle nudge on his shoulder and glanced over to see Seulgi looking at him worriedly.

     “You ok?” She asked softly.

     “Yeah, fine,” Sehun grumbled. Seulgi looked down for a moment, contemplating something, then back up at him.

     “I talked to Joohyun recently...She seemed pretty upset...Are you two ok?”

     “I don't know,” Sehun said honestly. “I think we are...”

     “You two are both so important to me...I really don't want things to be bad between you.”

     “I know, Seulgi. I'm sorry...”

     “Don't apologize. Just...treat her well. And be honest with yourself and her. I love you both so I don't want to get caught up in taking sides...But I'm here for both of you, ok?”

     “Yeah...Thanks...”

 

     Seulgi stood on her toes so she could reach up and wrap an arm around Sehun, giving him a comforting squeeze. Sehun briefly laid his cheek on the top of her head in response. Seulgi may play around with him more often than not, but when he needed someone to care for him and talk things through, she was always there for him.

 

     When Sehun's shift finally ended, he said goodbye to Seulgi and headed off to the mall to start shopping for Joohyun. He walked around aimlessly for an hour, then finally decided on jewelry. He went into a shop, scanning the displays for something that wasn't going to cost him an arm and a leg. He wanted something simple and ambiguous. Somehow, getting her a heart-shaped necklace felt really inappropriate, given their bumpy relationship and how he was currently feeling. That sort of necklace might improve their relationship though, at least temporarily. Sehun was at a loss of what to feel.

 

     He ultimately decided on a black choker with a small, silver moon pendant on it. It had no meaning whatsoever. It simply looked nice. He wouldn't be surprised if Joohyun didn't even like it in the end, but it was all Sehun could muster. He'd wanted to do something special for her a couple of months ago. Now he was genuinely questioning his feelings for her in general. She deserved so much more than he could give her.

 

     Following his exhausting attempt to buy something for Joohyun, Sehun was on to a slightly easier task. He was going to buy something for Junmyeon now, and he already had an idea of what he would get. It wouldn't be anything remotely fancy. He was just going to browse through the yarn section and pick some out that he thought Junmyeon would like. If it wasn't too expensive, he'd buy some more crochet hooks or other supplies as well. Junmyeon always said he could never have enough supplies or yarn.

 

     Sehun stopped when he spotted a rather soft, pastel pink yarn. The temptation to buy it was too much. He really wanted to see Junmyeon in light pink apparently. Although he thought Junmyeon would look really nice in white and navy blue as well. Junmyeon would look nice in anything.

 

     He ended up buying the pink yarn for himself. He would watch 9 hours of knitting tutorials on youtube if he had to, but he would make Junmyeon a scarf, even if it killed him. This Christmas, all he would be able to give was the yarn though. He ended up buying various shades of gray and brown since Junmyeon's favorite thing to do was crochet stuffed animals. It was a small gift, but he figured Junmyeon would still appreciate it.

 

     When he got home, he stuffed the yarn into a gift bag, keeping the pink yarn as well as some of the gray for himself. He'd take that over next time he saw Junmyeon and start working on it. He wasn't bold enough to give Junmyeon a completely pink scarf, but if he added some gray stripes, he thought it might be nice.

 

     After he'd finished gift bagging the yarn, shoving mountains of tissue paper in there to make sure it was thoroughly covered, he looked at his work triumphantly. Joohyun's necklace had been boxed and wrapped at the jewelers, so it looked much more presentable in comparison to Junmyeon's present. Sehun knew the older man wouldn't care about that sort of thing though.

 

     It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He still felt extremely guilty about Joohyun's fairly unimpressive gift, but what was done was done. He could only hope everything went well, come Christmas time.

 

~*~

     Joohyun had been cooking frantically with her mother the entire week leading up to Christmas. Cookies and other sweets were a tradition in their family and made good gifts, so the week preceding Christmas was always a scramble to get everything done. On top of cooking with her mother, Joohyun had her own cookies to bake this year for Seulgi and Sehun.

 

     Joohyun wanted to bake them close to Christmas so they would be as fresh as possible when she gave them away. It meant a lot of late nights after her mother had finished using the kitchen, but she was more than willing to sacrifice the sleep. It helped pass the time and distract her from her own anxieties at least.

 

     She'd already made plans to deliver Seulgi's cookies at work and she was going to see Sehun on Christmas Eve. They were supposed to spend the evening out and celebrate the start of Christmas together. It was supposed to be romantic. Joohyun had been dreaming about it and dying for the day to come for months. Now, she was more scared than anything.

 

     Sehun had been so distant with her as of late. It always felt like he was forcing himself to be with her and she hated it. Had she done something wrong to make him hate her? Was he already bored with her? Had he just been playing with her all along? No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get those thoughts out of her head. Every time she thought about asking Sehun what he really felt, she ended up chickening out. In the end, she was always too afraid to learn the truth, and her anxieties plagued her for another day.

 

     She stared into space, pausing her mixing, and sighed. She loved Sehun so much, and she hated worrying about whether or not the feelings were returned. Was their relationship going to crumble just like this? Joohyun wasn't sure she could handle losing Sehun. No, she _couldn't_ lose him.

 

     She felt tears pooling in her eyes and she set down her whisk to wipe them away. She wasn't about to let the dough get ruined over a few stray tears. She would get through this. She and Sehun could work things out. If she panicked now things would only get worse.

 

     In an attempt to keep herself together, she focused once more on making the cookies. She would make the best batch she'd ever made and pour all her feelings into it. That would have to sway Sehun at least a little bit. It was a naive and foolish thought, but it was enough to keep her going for one more night.

 

~*~

     Sehun sighed and laid his head on his arms. He was sitting at his desk, having just gotten off the phone with Joohyun. Even their phone calls left him drained now. It was scary how unenthusiastic he had become about their relationship. It just seemed so dull in comparison to what it had been. No, that wasn't it. It was dull in comparison to how he felt when he was with Junmyeon. Everything always seemed to bring Sehun back to Junmyeon, for better or for worse.

 

     He glanced at his calendar. Two dates were marked in red pen so he wouldn't forget them. They were right next to each other, so they especially stood out compared to the rest of the blank squares. One date was Christmas Eve, his dreaded date with Joohyun. The other was the day before, on which Junmyeon had arranged to meet him. Sehun hated the fact that he was looking forward to seeing Junmyeon so much more than he was Joohyun.

 

     Part of him almost wished he would see Junmyeon on Christmas day, but the man had told him that he would be spending it with Joohyun and their parents, which Sehun understood. If his parents weren't several cities away and he didn't have to work the day after Christmas, he would probably have gone back to see them too. Still, it would have been nice to have Junmyeon to look forward to after his date with Joohyun. The man would no doubt cheer him up. Then again, perhaps it was better to see Junmyeon in high spirits before he saw Joohyun. Why was he automatically assuming his date with Joohyun wouldn't end well though?

 

     The more Sehun thought about it, the more an idea swam around in his head. It was slowly becoming apparent to him that he didn't feel the same way about Joohyun anymore. It wasn't at all that he hated her, in fact he still thought she was a wonderful girl who deserved the world. He was just starting to realize that he wasn't the one who would give it to her. He would much rather give it to Junmyeon.

 

     Having finally admitted this to himself, another idea entered his head, one that was not so appealing and would definitely be painful if followed through. Should he break up with Joohyun? He had such mixed feelings. On one hand, he owed it to Joohyun not to drag her along in a one-sided relationship. That would only hurt them both in the end. Not only that, but he knew he couldn't lie to himself any longer about Junmyeon. On the other hand though, to break up with Joohyun on Christmas Eve seemed far too cruel. He knew how much she'd been looking forward to it. He had to at least make it through Christmas with her. Then he would have to find a way to break up without completely devastating her, though he knew that would be almost impossible to do.

 

     What would he do after that though? Would he pursue Junmyeon? Would Junmyeon even still want to see him after he broke Joohyun's heart? What if it was all in Sehun's head after all and Junmyeon really was only seeing him because he was his little sister's boyfriend? Would Sehun lose Junmyeon too? That thought filled him with even more dread than breaking up with Joohyun.

 

     He had no way of knowing how Junmyeon felt about him either. At least, not until he saw the man again. Perhaps he would come clean to Junmyeon when they met again. It could end horribly and permanently ruin his relationship with the man, but he could at least clarify whether or not the feelings were mutual. There really wasn't a smooth way to go about asking this, especially since he was still technically dating Joohyun.

 

     Sehun had a feeling that by Christmas day, at least one heart would be broken. All he could hope for was that it would all go by quickly.


	3. Chapter 3

      Finally, the 23rd of December arrived and Sehun found himself dressing up and standing in front of his mirror to make sure he looked presentable. He hadn't done that since he first started dating Joohyun. It was a little odd for him to do it now, but he wanted to look good for Junmyeon. He wasn't even being shameful about liking the man anymore. How had he become this way?

 

      He shook his head, forcing the negative thoughts out. Today was going to be a happy day. He would worry about the repercussions of his feelings later. He adjusted his flannel over his shirt and pulled the pant legs of his skinny jeans down a little bit so they weren't riding up. After that, he grabbed Junmyeon's gift and headed out of the apartment, locking the door behind him.

 

      Sehun walked to the small cafe where he worked. Junmyeon had agreed to pick him up there, not wanting him to make the long trek to his apartment on foot. Sehun was pleasantly surprised to see Junmyeon already there when he arrived, sitting on the front of his car as always. Sehun ran over, a wide smile on his face. The instant the other man spotted him, his face lit up and he got to his feet. Sehun stopped a short distance from him, slightly flustered and pink-cheeked.

      “Shall we go?” Junmyeon asked softly, motioning to the car.

      “Yeah!”

 

      Sehun got in on the passenger's side and Junmyeon started the car up. Perhaps it was because he was excited, but Sehun broke tradition and began chatting away at Junmyeon during the drive. He'd been so miserable over his own feelings and dying to see the other man for so long, he didn't think he could survive even a short car ride of silence. Junmyeon was just as happy and eager to speak with Sehun though.

 

      When they got to Junmyeon's apartment, Sehun found dinner already mostly prepared. Junmyeon had gone out of his way to make it nice, and even though some things were bought pre-cooked from the store, it was still enough to please Sehun. They set the table for two, and Junmyeon lit a few candles around the room and on the table. He swore it was because they were cinnamon scented and he didn't want his house to smell like TV dinners, but Sehun couldn't help but tease him about the atmosphere all the same. In truth, he was really enjoying how romantic it felt.

 

      They sat across from each other and talked animatedly as they ate. Junmyeon never brought up Joohyun thankfully, and Sehun didn't bother to think about her, as awful as it sounded. When the conversation slowed down, Sehun found himself staring intently into Junmyeon's eyes, the latter returning the action. Sehun felt two warm, sock-covered feet poke at his legs from under the table and a warm smile spread on his face. Two could play at that game.

 

      They kicked at each other, softly at first but gradually harder, until Junmyeon hit Sehun on the shin and he groaned, lowering his head so the other couldn't see. Junmyeon leaned over the table slightly, trying to make sure he was ok. At that same moment, Sehun hit him in the shin, causing Junmyeon to cry out in both surprise and pain. The older man stared at him, looking betrayed, until Sehun finally broke down laughing. It must have been contagious because soon enough, Junmyeon was laughing as well, eyes scrunched into crescents. Sehun loved the way they looked. It'd be nice if he could see Junmyeon laugh like that again.

 

      Following dinner, they did the dishes and settled in the living room. Junmyeon had picked out an array of cheesy Christmas movies and they were going to marathon them. First, they needed to exchange gifts though, as per Sehun's request. He had a feeling they would both be too tired and distracted if they waited until the movies were over.

 

      Sehun handed his gift over first, and he swore he'd never felt so nervous and excited at the same time to see Junmyeon open it. The instant the older man pulled out the yarn, his eyebrows shot up and he looked at Sehun in both surprise and happiness.

      “You did say you could never have enough yarn,” Sehun laughed.

      “I know but still...I was running out of these colors. You know me so well...” Sehun simply laughed and playfully pushed his shoulder.

      “It's not hard when your house is covered in brown and gray stuffed animals.”

      “I guess you're right,” Junmyeon chuckled. “Your turn to open your gift now!”

 

      He handed Sehun a blob of wrapping paper. Whatever was inside obviously didn't have a solid form because Sehun could squish it through the wrapping. He peeled away the paper and his jaw dropped. Inside was a crocheted gray bunny stuffed animal. It had white, plump cheeks, and Sehun could tell Junmyeon had given it the utmost care when making it. He'd even used small amounts of fabric paint to give it a little blush. Sehun knew that normal bunnies obviously didn't have that, but this was no normal bunny. He looked up at Junmyeon, a mixture of emotions coursing through his chest. How could he even put into words how he felt?

      “It's so cute!” He gasped, snuggling it closer.

      “I'm glad you like it~”

      “I love it!” Sehun exclaimed. _I love you_. The words were caught in his throat.

      “I worked pretty hard on it. I didn't have a lot of time to get it done before Christmas, you know?”  
      “I bet! I'm glad I bought you more gray yarn. This guy probably used a good amount up, huh?”

      “A little,” Junmyeon hummed. “But I won't be needing to refill my yarn stash for a while now.”

      “I can't believe you can make these things. You're so talented,” Sehun sighed, poking the bunny's cheek and unconsciously grinning.

      “It's all practice. I'd be more than happy to teach you.”

      “I'd love that.”

 

      Sehun finally glanced up from the bunny and stared into Junmyeon's eyes. He swore he could see something hidden in them. Before he could pinpoint just what, Junmyeon broke eye contact, clearing his throat and reaching for the first movie.

      “We'll do that another time, alright? For now, let's start our movie.”

 

      Sehun nodded slowly and watched as Junmyeon got up and inserted the first disc. When he came back over to the couch, Sehun scooted closer to him. He briefly felt Junmyeon stiffen, but the man relaxed soon enough. Sehun took that as his cue to continue. He rested his head on the man's shoulder, bunny cuddled to his chest. He felt Junmyeon exhale deeply, and soon enough, one of the man's hands was rested on Sehun's waist, fingers lightly brushing along his hip bone.

 

      Sehun sighed contentedly. He never wanted this to end. He loved how it felt to be beside Junmyeon, curled up in his arms. Surely Junmyeon had to feel the same way, right? Otherwise, he wouldn't always put his arm around Sehun the instant he was near.

 

      Junmyeon and Sehun both jumped at the sound of a phone ringing halfway through their second movie. Junmyeon paused it and got up begrudgingly to answer his phone. Sehun didn't intend on listening to the conversation, but it wasn't like he had much else to do. The name Junmyeon greeted instantly caught his attention as well.

      “Oh, Joohyun. It's pretty late...What's up?”

 

      Sehun's heart sunk. Why would Joohyun be calling? Had Junmyeon told her that Sehun would be coming over? He certainly hadn't told her. He'd stopped telling her anything related to Junmyeon for a long time.

      “The cake pan? Oh yeah, mom left it here after my birthday. Haven't used it since,” Junmyeon chuckled. “She needs it now? Hasn't she already baked like 10 cakes worth of cookies?” Junmyeon laughed as he listened to the other line. “Yeah, you can come over and get it I guess...When were you thinking of coming?” A pause. “In an hour or so? Yeah, that would work. Alright, I'll see you then.”

 

      Junmyeon hung up the phone and returned to Sehun with a sigh. He looked at him, smiling somewhat guiltily.

      “Joohyun needs to come over and get a cake pan. Our mom needs it apparently.”

      “Is she coming right now?” Sehun asked.

      “No, in a little over an hour. So we have time to finish our movie...But I think we might have to call it a night after this one.”

      “Yeah,” Sehun agreed. “That's fine though.”

 

      Junmyeon nodded and resumed his place beside Sehun. Within seconds, they were cuddled together again, Sehun's head resting on Junmyeon's chest so he could hear the man's heartbeat. It was a soothing, rhythmic sound, one that Sehun could get used to hearing often.

 

      Junmyeon hadn't seemed alright with the idea of Sehun being their when Joohyun came. Was he also aware of how she felt about them being together? Was he also feeling like what they were doing was going behind Joohyun's back? Did that mean he _did_ have some less than pure feelings and intentions regarding their friendship? Or was Sehun just reading too far into this because he was desperate?

 

      He couldn't really concentrate on the rest of the movie. The entire time, he was debating in his mind whether or not to ask Junmyeon about his feelings. It was driving him completely nuts, but at the same time, he was so afraid to change what they had going on now. He would have to take a chance if he ever wanted more though.

 

      The movie ended and Sehun pulled himself away, body aching to regain the warmth that was lost. He helped Junmyeon clean up a bit, then they headed to the door. The older man opened it and Sehun walked out, stopping in the doorway. If he was going to ask Junmyeon, now was the last chance he would get.

      “Thanks for coming over today,” Junmyeon said gently, leaning on the door frame.

      “Thank you for inviting me,” Sehun mumbled in response. “I had a lot of fun.” He held up the bunny. “And thanks for this little guy.” Junmyeon smiled bashfully.

      “You're welcome. Are you gonna give it a name?” Sehun looked down at it thoughtfully. After a moment, he smiled shyly and glanced up at Junmyeon.

      “I was thinking Junnie,” he mumbled. The idea had sounded so much better in his head.

 

      Junmyeon's eyes went wide and he stared at Sehun, searching his expression for something. This was Sehun's chance. He needed to say something.

 

      A short ways away from the apartment, Joohyun was walking over. She was rubbing her eyes tiredly, too many late nights finally adding up. She was rather irritated that her mother decided she needed to bake a cake now of all times. Couldn't she have just grabbed a cake pan or even a cake from the store? It was a lot closer than Junmyeon's house was.

 

      When she glanced up, her eyes widened when she saw Sehun there. She had no idea he would be visiting Junmyeon today. Then again, he never seemed to tell her his plans about anything, especially Junmyeon. She stopped near the stone wall surrounding the apartment complex so she was out of sight. She would just wait for the two to finish. She really didn't want to see Sehun just yet. She wasn't sure she was mentally prepared.

 

      Sehun opened his mouth, trying to formulate the words he so desperately longed to tell Junmyeon. Why couldn't anything come out? He was always so damn tongue tied with the other man. It was infuriating.

      “Junmyeon-”

      “Sehun, I...” The other man said simultaneously.

 

      Sehun stopped and looked at him with wide eyes, nodding for him to go on. Junmyeon didn't say anything else though. Instead, he placed his hands on both of Sehun's cheeks and pulled him closer, pressing their lips together. Sehun gasped, his body stiffening for a second, then relaxing into the kiss, closing his eyes. He nibbled at Junmyeon's bottom lip, pulling on it slightly. It was just as soft as he'd always imagined it. He never wanted this to end.

 

      Unfortunately, it ended fairly soon after Junmyeon started it. When he pulled away, he was breathing shakily and looking at Sehun in a mixture of guilt, nervousness, and excitement. He placed his hand over his mouth, fingers brushing along his lips. Sehun was just as shocked. That at least answered his question about how Junmyeon was feeling.

      “That kiss...” Sehun mumbled.

      “I'm so sorry,” Junmyeon whispered. “I shouldn't have done that...”

      “Junmyeon, it's ok.”

      “No it's not...I shouldn't have done that, oh my God...Please, just...Just pretend like that didn't happen.”

      “I won't,” Sehun stated bluntly. Junmyeon looked at him with a worried expression that would make even the most cold-hearted pity him.

      “I'm so sorry. I ruined everything.”

      “Junmyeon, that's not it...” Sehun quickly soothed. “I love you...”

      “W-What...? Sehun, that's...But Joohyun...”

      “I know,” the younger sighed, looking beyond guilty. “I know, but I can't help it...”

      “Sehun, we shouldn't be like this...We shouldn't even be talking about this. Now isn't the time or the place. Joohyun is going to be here soon.”

      “Next time we meet,” Sehun insisted. “Next time, we're going to talk this through, alright? Honest and straightforward.”

      “Y-Yeah...”

      “I'm going to go for now,” Sehun said gently, grabbing Junmyeon's hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. “Thank you for tonight. For everything...” Junmyeon nodded, squeezing Sehun's hand back.

      “I'll see you around. Will you be ok to get home on your own?”

      “I'll be fine.”

 

      Sehun sighed and let go of Junmyeon's hand, giving the man one last reassuring smile before turning around and heading away. Junmyeon waited until Sehun was out of sight before shutting his door and glancing at the clock, waiting for Joohyun.

 

      Joohyun, upon witnessing the scene, had squatted to the ground, hand over her mouth. She was thankful Sehun hadn't noticed her along the stone wall and had headed in the opposite direction when he left. There was no way she could even begin to respond to what had just happened.

 

      Her brother had kissed Sehun, and the latter hadn't done _anything_ to stop it. Was this why he had been so distant with her? He was cheating on her. With Junmyeon, of all people. And her _brother_ was going along with it. The two people she'd loved most had betrayed her.

 

      Tears streaked down her cheeks as she silently cried. All she could do was blame herself. For not realizing sooner what was going on. For being so damn naive. For introducing the two in the first place. For not being good enough. It was a dangerous, negative, and untrue outlook, but she was far too emotional to be able to rationalize her way out of it. So instead, she cried. She stayed there crying for a long time, until her legs were numb from both the cold and the position they'd been in. Her phone rang, most likely Junmyeon or her mother to check in on her, but she didn't bother to answer it. She wouldn't be able to talk to anyone in her current state.

 

      When she finally managed to pick herself up off the ground, she stared at Junmyeon's apartment door. She didn't want to see him, cake pan be damned. She turned around and walked away, heading to a nearby store to pick one up. When she got home, she lied to her mother and said that Junmyeon had lost the pan so she bought a new one, then headed to her room. When she was safe behind a locked door, she let herself break down crying once more. She was going to see Sehun the following day, and it was going to be absolutely miserable.

 

~*~

      When Sehun picked Joohyun up for their date the following evening, she was stone-faced and silent. No matter what Sehun did or said, she was adamant about not talking. Needless to say, he was a nervous wreck within 15 minutes. He had made reservations at a nice restaurant, but they still had some time to spare. He'd initially planned to take her shopping, but given her current attitude, he didn't think she would be up for that. Instead, he walked around for a while, hunting for beautiful, lit up Christmas displays. He took the longest route he could think of to get to the restaurant. It was strange how uncomfortable this silence was in comparison to the times in Junmyeon's car.

 

      When they got there, they were seated at a table and given a menu. Sehun was thankful for anything that would distract him from Joohyun glaring daggers into him. He had no idea why she might have been so angry, but it was getting old very quickly. His only guess was that Junmyeon told her something. The thought frankly horrified him. Sehun didn't think Junmyeon would have told her about what happened though. Not without consulting Sehun first. He wasn't that thoughtless.

 

      When their dinner arrived, Sehun breathed a sigh of relief. It was another distraction from Joohyun's piercing glare. Whatever was bothering her, Sehun had a feeling that he would hear about it later. So much for giving her a nice Christmas date.

 

      When they finished eating, Sehun solemnly lead her out of the restaurant and back to his apartment. They were supposed to exchange gifts and spend the night watching _more_ Christmas movies and having a 'romantic' evening, whatever that had once entailed. Now Sehun was wondering if Joohyun would even spend more than 5 minutes with him. Perhaps she would give him the silent treatment for the whole night out of spite. She wasn't usually the type to get so angry, but Sehun hardly recognized her now.

 

      Once they were in Sehun's small apartment, he sighed, leaning against the door. Joohyun had automatically headed to his bedroom. Sehun needed fortitude to get through this. He could already feel a confrontation coming. Honesty was the best policy. Sehun was repeating it like a mantra.

 

      When he got to his room, Joohyun was seated on the bed, looking more sad than angry. Sehun sighed and walked over to her. He grabbed her gift box off his desk and held it out, sitting down beside her.

      “It's, um...It's not much, but...Merry Christmas,” he mumbled.

 

      She took the gift and opened it lifelessly. After the wrapping paper was off, she opened the box slowly, eyes landing on the black choker and moon pendant. Her fingers brushed over the metal, the opal detailing glistening as she shifted it. She was silent the entire time, which Sehun probably should have expected, but it didn't make him any less nervous.

      “I'm sorry if you hate it...” He whispered.

      “Will you put it on me?” She asked softly, her voice shaking. Sehun's eyes went wide. That was the first thing she'd said to him all night.

      “Of course.”

 

      She lifted her hair so Sehun could wrap it around her neck and clumsily fasten it at the back. When he dropped his hands from her neck, she let her hair fall back down, and brushed her fingers over the small moon once more. Her lip quivered and finally a sob escaped.

      “I can't do this.”

 

      It was barely audible, but to Sehun, it was as loud as a drum. She sounded so pained, so broken. Why were things turning out like this?

      “Joohyun, what's wrong?” He asked, placing his hand on her back. She still didn't look at him.

      “I saw you last night...with Junmyeon.”

      “W-What?” Sehun gasped, his throat feeling unbearably dry.

      “He kissed you...and you didn't pull away or push him or yell or anything!” She hissed, her voice raising as she listed off each possible reaction. “Why didn't you!? We're you planning to play with us both all along!?”

      “Joohyun, that's not it at all!”

      “How could you? How could you cheat on me!? With my own brother of all people! Was I that unimpressive compared to him?”

      “I didn't cheat on you!” Sehun exclaimed. “That kiss was the first time anything like that has happened, alright? And it was really sudden and unexpected!”

      “How can I believe you?” She screamed, and Sehun winced. He'd never seen her so upset before, and she had every right to be. “You betrayed my trust!”

      “Joohyun-”

      “If you were going to take Junmyeon, why did you have to keep me around? Was one of us not enough for you!? Why couldn't you have just dumped me before it would hurt this much?” Tears were streaming down her cheeks. “I love you so much...” She whimpered. “Why didn't you push him away?”

 

      Sehun didn't know what to say. Joohyun got to her feet, wiping at her eyes. Sehun stood up and grabbed her wrist, holding her back from leaving the room. It was true he planned to break up with her, but he'd never meant to hurt her like this, and he definitely didn't want her to leave in this state.

      “Joohyun, calm down. Let's talk about this...”

      “Did you ever even love me?” She asked quietly, her voice shaking once more. Sehun wanted to hold and comfort her, but he knew that wouldn't help either of them.

      “I did,” he answered honestly. He still loved her, which was why it was so hard to see her like this.

      “But now you love Junmyeon...More than me?”

 

      Sehun bit his lip. It was true. Junmyeon meant so much to him now. He couldn't lie to her. As much as it would hurt her to know, it was the inevitable truth.

      “Yes...” He whispered.

 

      He saw her shoulders shake and she ripped her wrist out of his grip. He half expected her to run away, but instead she raised her hand, forming it into a fist, and smacked his chest a couple of times. It didn't hurt physically, but each thump brought Sehun's conscience crashing down on him. He was the worst. He should have been better than this. Joohyun deserved so much more.

 

      She walked over to his desk, eyes immediately finding the picture frame containing a photo of them during a much happier time. She ran her fingers along the wood before picking it up, looking at it sadly. Sehun gulped as he saw her knuckles turning white as she held it. She was going to snap again. He'd never seen her this angry before. He'd really fucked up.

      “Why him?” She asked, malice in her voice this time.

      “I don't know,” Sehun answered nervously. Joohyun scoffed.

      “I should have known better. I'm such an idiot. I should have realized you would fall for him the instant you saw him...He's so much better than me after all...”

      “Joohyun, stop. You can't compare yourself.”

      “But you did it too, didn't you!? That's how you picked which one of us you'd rather fuck over, right!?”

 

      Sehun winced at the sudden outburst. He didn't know how to respond, yet again. Joohyun shook her head in disbelief. It was the first time Sehun had seen so much rage and disappointment in her eyes. This was turning out to be so much harder than he had anticipated. He hadn't expected it to be easy either.

      “What does he have that I don't!?” She screamed, shoulders shaking violently. “How could he sweep you off your feet like it was nothing!? I tried so hard to get you to notice me...I TRIED SO HARD!”  
      “Joohyu-”

      “SHUT UP!”

 

      She threw the picture frame at the ground and it shattered, broken glass and wooden frame scattering everywhere. Sehun stared at her with wide eyes, holding his hands up cautiously. She was getting out of hand now.

      “You didn't hold me the same way after you met him! You got more and more distant. You were disgusted with me weren't you!?”

 

      She grabbed a paperweight off his desk and threw it on the ground this time. Sehun took a step forward, hoping to pull her away from his desk before she could break anything else. That only resulted in him getting a handful of pencils and pens thrown at his face. She turned to grab something else to throw in order to keep him away, and that was when she spotted the crocheted bunny, sitting helplessly on his desk. She picked it up, laughing bitterly.

      “He made this for you...”

 

      Sehun didn't say anything. She was angry enough on her own. He didn't need to provoke her further. He saw her grip tighten on the bunny's arm and he tensed. He should have acted the instant she'd picked it up, but he was too late.

 

      She grabbed a pair of scissors off his desk and cut its ears several times, cursing under her breath. Sehun rushed her, not caring that he stepped on broken glass, and grabbed the scissors. He wrestled them out of her hand, thankful that he was much stronger than her, and threw them on his bed, where they were out of her reach. Next, he grabbed the bunny and pried it from her grip.

      “STOP!” He shouted, glaring at her. “I understand that you're mad, and you have a right to be, alright? But this? This is just a tantrum. If you aren't going to listen to what I have to say, then get out!”

 

      Joohyun fully broke down crying, her knees giving out. She slowly fell to the ground, out of Sehun's grip. She held her face in her hands and wailed, not trying to hold back anymore. Sehun sighed, looking down at his bunny. He vaguely registered a pain in his foot from the broken glass, but his chest hurt much more. He'd been naive to think he could find a gentler way through this break up. There was nothing gentle about it.

 

      He put the bunny on the bed, then walked over to Joohyun, limping slightly. He bent over and grabbed her forearms. She tried to pull away, but Sehun tightened his grip.

      “Come on, stand up,” he said softly, no anger in his voice. “There's broken glass on the floor.”

 

      She let him pull her to her feet. He didn't hug her or anything, simply held her wrists, rubbing slightly comforting circles on them. She let out a shaky breath, eyes planted on the ground. She couldn't bare to look him in the eyes.

      “We're over,” she mumbled. Sehun closed his eyes and sighed.

      “Yeah.”

      “I'm going home...”

      “Ok.”

 

      She pulled away from his hold and turned around. As she was walking away, she knocked over the gift bag meant for Sehun, spilling half the cookies from the hand decorated box inside onto the floor. She paused looking at it for a brief moment, and Sehun could see her eyes fill with tears once more. He wanted to comfort her so badly, but he was the problem. Anything he did would just add fuel to a fire that was barely being contained. So he stood there, clenching his fists, praying she would leave before she started crying once more.

 

      Finally, she turned away, running out of the room. Sehun limped over to his bedroom doorway and watched as she ran to the main entrance, putting her shoes on. As she was opening the front door, he allowed himself to show one last bit of concern.

      “Be safe on your way home...”

 

      He received no response, only a door closing quietly. When he realized he was finally alone in his apartment, he let his own tears fall. It was over. He felt horrible for the sense of relief that flooded his body, but that had been one of the most stressful experiences in his life. As relieved as he felt though, he was just as miserable. He hadn't properly explained himself at all, and he'd hurt Joohyun far worse than he ever wanted to. He felt like the scum of the earth.

 

      He hobbled to his bathroom, pulling his slightly bloody sock off his foot before cleaning it and bandaging it up. He had to wipe his eyes several times to see through the tears. When he was done patching up, he set to work on cleaning up his room. He'd never expected Joohyun to be that hysterical. He should have called the whole thing off as soon as he'd decided to break up with her. It probably would have been at least a little less painful.

 

      There were several things Sehun could have done differently though, but it was too late. No amount of dwelling on it would fix his relationship with Joohyun or make either of them feel better. All he could do was clean up and move on. Hopefully someday, he could at least tell Joohyun he was sorry and that she was a truly wonderful person. Even after everything that had happened, he still felt this way.

 

      It took him a while to clean up the broken glass and reorganize his desk. When he was done, he was too tired and upset to even think about doing anything other than sleeping, so he laid down in his bed. The bunny plushy that Junmyeon had made him was sitting beside him, its ears no longer standing up cutely like they had before. Instead, they were crooked and starting to unravel. A couple more tears dripped from his eyes as he snuggled it close, wishing it would somehow magically turn into Junmyeon. He was despicable for thinking about him even after everything he did, but he couldn't help it. He longed for the man's comfort and warm arms.

 

      Despite how exhausted he was, it took Sehun a long time to get to sleep. It was the very beginning of Christmas day by then, and Sehun already wanted the day to be over. This had to have been the worst Christmas ever.

 

~*~

      Junmyeon arrived at his parents house Christmas evening completely unaware of anything that had gone on with Joohyun and Sehun. All he knew was Joohyun had never showed up to get the pan, which already had him worried about her. He was surprised when he didn't see her downstairs with their parents. She was always pretty excited and sociable when they were having family gatherings. Sometimes their parents were so busy they hardly saw them, so Joohyun never missed out on an opportunity to be with the whole family.

 

      His mother pulled him aside almost as soon as he arrived. He was initially worried she was going to discipline him. Unless Sehun told Joohyun everything and she in turn told their mother, the woman would have no other way of knowing what was going on though. Instead, she wanted to talk about something different but still related to Joohyun.

      “She hasn't come out of her room all day,” his mother explained worriedly. “She won't tell me what's wrong. All I know is she had a date with Sehun yesterday. My guess is things didn't go well.”

 

      Junmyeon's heart sunk. Had Sehun broken up with her already? If so, did he tell her about what Junmyeon had done? He'd never wanted to break the two of them up. He should have kept his damn urges under control. He was the worst.

      “Your father and I have to deliver a couple more gifts to some of our friends, so we'll be going out for a few hours. Do you think you can try and talk to her? She tends to tell you more than she tells us.”

      “I-I can try...” Junmyeon stuttered. His mother smiled and hugged him.

      “Thank you!”

 

      He watched as his parents pulled on coats and grabbed several boxes of gifts. They would probably be gone for a while, which meant Junmyeon was going to be alone with whatever hell was waiting for him in Joohyun's room. He was probably the reason for all of this though, so he had to take responsibility and talk to her.

 

      When his parents had left, he headed to Joohyun's room, a feeling of dread already pooling in his stomach. He knocked lightly on the door.

      “Joohyun? It's me...” He received no response. “I'm gonna come in, ok?”

 

      He opened the door slowly, then slipped inside and shut it behind him. Joohyun was sitting on her bed with her knees to her chest, face nestled in between them. Junmyeon walked over cautiously and sat down in front of her.

      “Hey, what's wrong?” He asked gently, placing his hand on her knee.

      “Go away. I don't want to see you,” she mumbled, voice muffled by her legs.

      “Did something happen with Sehun yesterday?” Junmyeon asked. He knew it was a very touchy question, but it was the most likely cause of all of this.

      “We broke up if that's what you're wondering.”

      “What? Why?”

      “Do you really have to ask that after kissing him?” Joohyun hissed, finally looking up at him. Her glare felt like it pierced right through him.

      “Joohyun, I...”

      “I already screamed and cried enough yesterday,” she sighed. “I don't want to do it again with you...I just don't understand why you would do it. How could you do something like that with my boyfriend?”

      “I don't know,” Junmyeon answered weakly. “I was stupid and I wasn't thinking. I never should have kissed him, and for that, I'm sorry...But that was my fault, not his.”

      “Save it,” Joohyun snapped, though her voice didn't raise in volume. “You and Sehun had been getting closer for a while now. It stopped being friendship a long time ago, didn't it?”

      “I don't know about him, but for me...Yes, it did. But I was never going to act on it. The kiss was a mistake. I never should have done that.” Joohyun rolled her eyes.

      “Did you care about me at all? Anyone with even the least bit of decency wouldn't have done that.”

      “I know,” Junmyeon muttered. She was completely right, regardless of his excuses.

      “I didn't even mind that you two were seeing each other. I was happy because it meant you had another friend in your life...But this was too much.”

      “I'm sorry...”

      “You know how this feels,” she whispered, biting her lip to keep from crying. “This happened to you, so you had to do the same to me?”

      “That's not it and you know it, Joohyun.”

      “I was there for you when you were struggling...I've always been there for you...Why did you stab me in the back like this?” She whimpered, laying her face in between her knees once more. “I loved him so much...You _knew_ how much I loved him!”

      “I'm sorry...”

 

      It was all he could say, but it didn't help anything. Joohyun's shoulders shook and a few quiet sobs escaped. Junmyeon closed his eyes, not wanting to hear the broken cries. He hated the fact that he was the cause of them. He'd really messed everything up.

      “I don't want to see you again,” Joohyun said quietly. “Don't come here when I'm home.”

      “Joohyun...”

      “I'm serious. I don't want to see you again. Holidays and parents be damned,” she stated, glaring up at him. “I don't know if I can ever forgive you. At least respect my wishes this one time, and stay away from me. Now get out. I'll be down for dinner.”

 

      She turned away from him and laid down on her bed. He sighed and got to his feet, leaving her alone in the room. He was smart enough to know when to stop talking and let battles be lost. She had every right to be furious and never want to see him again as well. What he'd done was horrible, and she was right. He knew _exactly_ how it felt. He never should have put her through this.

 

      When his parents got home, he kept it vague, saying that she'd broken up with Sehun and wasn't in the mood to talk about it. Their parents were extremely disappointed, since Sehun had apparently made a great impression on them. His mother decided that Joohyun would get the biggest slice of cake that evening, wanting to do anything that could possibly cheer her up. Junmyeon managed a weak smile. His parents eventually started getting dinner ready, grumbling amongst each other about how awful it was of Sehun to break up with her on Christmas Eve. If they knew that Junmyeon was the cause of everything, they would probably be furious and beyond disappointed. Perhaps it was better if he didn't come home for a while.

 

      Joohyun came down for dinner, much like she said she would. The entire time, she ignored Junmyeon's existence. Dinner was fairly quiet, his parents supplying most of the discussion. As soon as the food was gone, Junmyeon decided it was time to leave. His parents tried to convince him to stay longer, but he made up some excuse about needing to wake up early the next day to meet a coworker. They exchanged hugs and goodbyes and Junmyeon headed to the door. As he opened it, he glanced back into the house one last time, and his eyes met Joohyun's briefly. She turned away seconds later, not muttering a word of goodbye, not that Junmyeon expected it. He left the house silently, unsure of how he could fix the situation or _if_ he could even fix it. He knew one thing for sure though. He never should have gotten close to Sehun.

 

~*~

      Sehun sighed as he watched the clock tick, leaning on his uninjured foot. He was working and his shift ended in about an hour, but the day seemed to be dragging. He'd never been so thankful to be paired with someone other than Seulgi for this shift. He was almost certain Joohyun had told her what had happened by now. Seulgi was always the first to hear about anything since she was Joohyun's best friend. She'd even been the first to hear about when they slept together the first time, much to Sehun's embarrassment.

 

      Seulgi would probably be livid with him. He had no excuse after all. Joohyun had trusted him and he'd betrayed her. It was as simple as that. All he could really hope for now was to civilly patch things up once she'd calmed down and to figure out where he sat with Junmyeon. The man hadn't contacted him since that evening, and Sehun was starting to worry. It had been a few days since Christmas.

 

      Sehun let out a frustrated grunt and pulled out his phone. The cafe wasn't busy at the moment thankfully. If Junmyeon wasn't going to contact him and talk about what happened, Sehun would instigate it. He couldn't stand the way things were left hanging. Hope of seeing Junmyeon again was practically the only thing keeping Sehun going.

 

      He texted the man, asking him to meet him in an hour at the cafe. Several minutes went by with no answer, and Sehun was beginning to lose hope. Maybe Junmyeon was done with him after all. Just as he was about to slip his phone back in his pocket, he got a text. He opened it with a gulp, and breathed a sigh of relief when Junmyeon had agreed. At least he had something to think about while he finished his shift. He wasn't sure he was looking forward to it though.

 

      When he was finally done, he headed out of the cafe, limping slightly. Junmyeon was waiting for him at the front of his car once more, and Sehun couldn't help but smile when he saw him. No matter how nervous he was about the coming conversation, Junmyeon never failed to make Sehun happy.

 

      He walked over as quickly as he could. Junmyeon's brow furrowed when he noticed the small limp in Sehun's step and he immediately grabbed his arm when he was in reach.

      “Are you ok?” Junmyeon asked worriedly. Sehun sighed, offering a tired smile.

      “Yeah. Just cut my foot. It's fine.”

      “Are you sure? You were on your feet all day...That probably didn't help it, right?”

      “It's fine, Junmyeon. I promise.”

      “Let me take you home at least. You walk to work right? I don't want you limping all the way home.”

      “Alright, but Junmyeon...We need to talk. That's why I called you.”

      “We will. Let's just get you home for now...”

 

      Junmyeon let go of his arm and walked around to the driver's side. Sehun took his usual spot in the passenger's seat, and soon they were off. The car ride was silent as always, but there was a tenseness in the air that wasn't normally there, which didn't bode well. Somehow, Sehun had a feeling that once the silence ended, things would get much worse. It didn't help that Junmyeon didn't sing at all the entire car ride either.

 

      When they pulled into a parking spot at Sehun's apartment complex, Junmyeon turned the car off. The silence that followed without even the hum of the engine was deafening. Sehun couldn't take it anymore, so he finally decided to speak up.

      “Joohyun and I broke up.”

      “I know...”

      “What does this make us, Junmyeon?” Sehun asked nervously.

 

      The older man bit his lip and sighed, thinking about how to respond. Sehun's nerves were so on edge, he felt like he was going to vomit. The answer shouldn't have taken this long, right?

      “This doesn't make us anything,” Junmyeon finally responded, voice shaking. He didn't dare look Sehun in the eyes.

      “W-What do you mean?”

      “The kiss was a mistake. It never should have happened. I'm sorry for forcing it on you.”

      “Junmyeon...This isn't just about the kiss. I like you...Don't you like me?”

 

      Sehun's voice was faltering and he could already feel tears stinging at his eyes. He knew he shouldn't have been hopeful, but still, after all the hell he went through with Joohyun, he didn't need to go through it again with Junmyeon. Especially not now that he'd admitted he loved Junmyeon the most.

      “Sehun, I can't do this.” The words stung even worse than when Joohyun had said them. “What I did was so horrible and unfair to Joohyun...and to you. I never should have come between you two.”

      “What's done is done, Junmyeon. Besides, you aren't in between us anymore. We broke up.”

      “And that's part of the problem. I know how it feels to be betrayed by someone you love, Sehun. And Joohyun was betrayed by two people she loves. I can't continue to hurt her.”

      “So what? You're going to back out now?”

      “Yes,” Junmyeon conceded quietly. “I'm not going to see you or her anymore. If you let things calm down, I'm sure you can work it out between you two.”

      “You're assuming I still have feelings for her,” Sehun said irritably. “I love her, but not the same way I used to. I won't be getting back together with her if that's what you're hoping. I hate that I hurt her, but it's not going to change the way I feel about you, Junmyeon. The damage is done. I love you.”

      “I can't, Sehun. I'm sorry.”

 

      Sehun swallowed, his throat feeling unbearably dry. Tears were still stinging his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. At least not in front of Junmyeon. He had to accept this gracefully. He was getting a taste of his own medicine now. He'd broken up only to be rejected. He didn't think he could make more of a mess of his love life.

      “Ok,” Sehun breathed, trying his hardest to remain calm. “So I guess that's it then.”

      “I'm sorry,” Junmyeon whispered. Sehun merely shook his head.

      “No, it's alright. I understand...If there's nothing else to talk about, I'll get going then...”

      “Yeah...”

      “Thanks for the ride home. It really helped...Stay well, Junmyeon.”

      “You too, Sehun.”

 

      The younger offered a weak smile and opened the car door. He hesitated for a brief moment before finally getting out and shutting the door. He walked as fast as he could at that point to get out of Junmyeon's sight so he could wipe at his eyes, which were now leaking tears down his cheeks. He hadn't expected the meeting to go smoothly, but he'd hoped that Junmyeon's feelings for him would have been a little stronger than that. In the end, it really was only Sehun that had fallen so hard.

 

      When he got to his apartment, he kicked his shoes off and rushed into his room. He flopped down on the bed lifelessly, immediately cuddling his bunny plushy to his chest. It would be the closest thing he would ever get to Junmyeon now. He wished it hadn't gotten damaged. He didn't know how to even begin fixing it. Everything was just going to hell, and Sehun was so damn tired.

 

      He cried for a surprisingly long time. He only stopped when his stomach growled and his head ached. He forced himself out of bed long enough for a meal, then he was right back in it, this time to sleep off the exhaustion he'd brought on from crying. Sehun wished he could turn off feelings and social interactions for a while until he could recover, but that wasn't possible. Tomorrow he would have to work again, and this time, he would have nothing to look forward to. He dreaded the next shift he would have with Seulgi. That would be just one more uncomfortable experience.

 

      It took him ages to get to sleep that night, and when he woke up the next morning, he didn't feel rested at all. His only option was to drag himself out of bed and force his way through the day. He hoped time would heal all the wounds he had inflicted on himself and Joohyun. He never should have fallen for Junmyeon.


	4. Chapter 4

      New Years was quickly approaching. Sehun didn't have any plans in the first place, but now it was especially true. He was mostly busying himself with work just to give him something to do. He had a surprisingly small amount of friends, and he'd managed to piss two of his closest ones off. Seulgi was a whole different level.

 

      He'd finally had a shift with her, and she refused to look at him the entire time. Sehun anticipated that, but it still hurt. After all, he'd been friends with her longer than he'd even known Joohyun. He would be the first to admit he messed up, but losing every close friend he had seemed a little too harsh.

 

      It wasn't until New Years Eve that Seulgi actually started interacting with him. He was working a long shift until closing, but she was only working half the day. Sehun had started looking forward to shifts when she wasn't there because they tended to be a little more comfortable to get through. To his surprise, she nudged him on the shoulder the same way she always did about halfway through her shift when the cafe was pretty much empty.

      “Why did you do it?” She asked softly.

      “What?”

      “You know what I'm talking about. Why did you cheat on Joohyun? I just want to know your reasons...”

      “I never intended to cheat on her,” Sehun sighed. “As soon as I realized Junmyeon was the one I liked, I had planned to break up with her...I never wanted to drag her along or cheat on her...Things just...happened...”

      “Joohyun said that Junmyeon kissed you.”

      “Yeah,” Sehun mumbled, somewhat bitter. “But it didn't matter in the end.” There was a small lull as Seulgi searched Sehun's eyes. “Anyways, I'd wanted to give Joohyun a good Christmas but that backfired royally and it's turned out to be one of the worst Christmases for all of us. I guess I should have dumped her a week before.”

      “Well, I don't think either timings were ideal,” Seulgi sighed. “Either way it was going to hurt her too...But it sounded like you wanted to treat her well in the end, and I appreciate that. Was the kiss really the first instance of something more between you and Junmyeon?”

      “Well, it was the only time we'd ever kissed if that's what you were wondering. And it was unexpected,” Sehun sighed. He didn't want to think about Junmyeon anymore. “We usually just hung out and watched movies or ate dinner. Although I admit we snuggled during some of the movies...But I swear, I didn't want to cheat on Joohyun whenever I saw Junmyeon. I even tried to stop seeing him when I started feeling weird about him, but I...I couldn't...”

      “Junmyeon is pretty cuddly,” Seulgi agreed. “Even I've snuggled him during a movie or two with Joohyun.”

      “He turned me down though, so I guess that train's crashed as well,” Sehun announced, pained smile on his face. Seulgi looked just as sad.

      “He kissed you though...Junmyeon isn't the type to play around with people's feelings.”

      “He didn't want to hurt Joohyun, so he broke things off with me. I'm pretty sure he wants me to get back together with her, but I'm not going to. That ship has sailed and I'm just going to accept defeat.”

      “This really sucks, Sehun,” Seulgi mumbled. “I was always worried about this moment after you and Joohyun started dating. I don't want to pick sides...I love you all, even Junmyeon...You guys are going to have to sort things out on your own.”

      “I know. Honestly, I think right now all I can do is move on,” Sehun sighed. “If you want to stop talking to me, I understand. I'm sure Joohyun isn't thrilled that you're still seeing me.”

      “She's calmed down a lot since then, actually. She's still really upset and depressed, but she's not being irrational anymore.”

      “That's good,” Sehun sighed. “That she's acting rationally again, I mean. She was pretty intense the night we broke up...I was worried about her...”

      “Yeah, she told me she acted up. I don't think she'll ever admit it to you, but she feels pretty embarrassed about it.”

      “She doesn't need to. I hurt her. I had it coming.”

      “I want you both to be ok,” Seulgi said gently. “You don't have to make up and go out again, in fact I think that would cause more problems, but I want you both to be happy again...”

      “Well, stay by Joohyun's side. She needs someone to support her right now and I obviously can't be that person.”

      “You need someone by your side too, don't you?” She asked, looking up at him. He bit his lip. She was right.

      “Yeah...” He muttered.

      “I'm not going to take sides because you're both my friends...but I'm here for you, alright? And I'll let you know how Joohyun is doing too.”

      “Thanks...”

 

      Seulgi patted him on the back. Soon enough customers arrived at the cafe and they were back to their always perky retail personas. By the time they were done with that wave of customers, it was time for Seulgi to leave. She seemed nervous and reluctant to leave Sehun on his own, but he swore he would be fine and he would have another person working with him in a matter of minutes. That wasn't what she'd meant of course, but Sehun didn't need a pity party on New Years Eve. He didn't deserve that kind of attention or drama, nor did he want it.

 

      Really, all he wanted was for Junmyeon to come back into his life, but he knew that was asking too much. So he would settle for a peaceful shift to end the year. He hoped that at the start of the new year, things would gradually start to look up.

 

~*~

      A few weeks went by after Sehun talked to Seulgi. She no longer avoided him or gave him hateful looks. Instead, things seemed to go back to normal. It was the only normalcy that had returned to Sehun's life honestly. He hadn't contacted Junmyeon or Joohyun since Christmas. The pain was still there, but it was starting to sting just a little bit less.

 

      Sehun's life had become extremely dull though. All he did was work then go home and waste the hours away. He tried calling some of his old friends, but most of them were busy with post-New Years plans and the like. Ultimately, Sehun gave up and just decided to resume his routine of lifelessly watching movies to pass the time. He really needed better hobbies.

 

      He'd increased his hours a little at work, mostly because he had the time now and any extra cash was welcome. He was grateful to have a few more shifts with Seulgi as a result. She really was the only friend he could rely on at the moment.

 

      They were working a closing shift together one evening when she finally decided to bring up Joohyun. Sehun hadn't asked about her, but Seulgi would occasionally give him small updates. This night, she had something different in mind.

      “You know, I don't think Joohyun's really gonna move on until you two talk about things properly...without screaming at each other,” she sighed.

      “Easier said than done, Seulgi,” Sehun grumbled, cleaning one of the tables.

      “She hasn't talked to Junmyeon either...In fact, she told me she hasn't seen him since Christmas.”

      “That makes sense. I wouldn't want to see either of us if I were her.”

      “Sehun...Junmyeon hasn't even come home once since then. This break up should not tear their damn family apart, especially since you and Junmyeon aren't even seeing each other.”

      “And how am I supposed to fix this? You should be rallying Junmyeon, not me. I'm not related anymore, remember?”

      “Joohyun needs to hear it from you how you felt during that time. She never got to hear what you told me about how you wanted to treat her well in the end.”

      “What will that fix? Nothing.”

      “It'll give her the peace of mind she needs to move on, Sehun. She still thinks you were two-timing her when all you were really doing was watching movies.”

      “And snuggling...”

      “Ok, that might be a little harder to explain, but it's not like you and I haven't snuggled before.”

      “But the feelings were different.”

      “Stop fighting me when I'm trying to support you!” Seulgi whined. “The point is, as soon as you realized you loved him, you had planned to set things right as gently as you could, right?”

      “Yeah...”

      “I think she deserves to know that. She feels really betrayed right now when she really shouldn't have to...and if you can at least set her mind at ease there, I think it would really help.”

      “She probably still doesn't want to see me though, right?”

      “Leave that to me, ok? Just...tell her the truth and end things properly.”

      “Alright...”

 

      Sehun had figured Seulgi would gradually talk Joohyun into the idea. Instead, Seulgi had texted Joohyun to come to the cafe that night, without even informing her that Sehun was there. She didn't even tell Sehun that Joohyun was coming until she was apparently almost there and they were 15 minutes from closing. Needless to say, he wanted to scream.

      “What the hell!?”

      “I said to leave it to me, didn't I?” She singsonged.

      “I didn't think you would do it this way!”

 

      Before they could continue arguing, the bell above the door rang and a customer walked into the cafe. They both turned and welcomed the customer in their usual polite voices. Sehun's heart sank when his eyes met with Joohyun's for the first time in weeks. She looked well, albeit nervous and very confused. She didn't say anything before grabbing the door handle with one of her hands. Before she could leave, Seulgi called out to her.

      “Don't you dare, Joohyun!”

 

      The girl stopped, pouting at Seulgi. Sehun watched as his coworker practically dragged Joohyun into the cafe, sitting her at one of the tables. The next thing he knew, Seulgi was snapping her fingers at him and pointing at the seat across from Joohyun. He gulped and sat down, looking at her with a pleading glance. This was _not_ how he wanted to patch things up.

      “Don't we have to close?” Sehun asked.

      “I can handle it. You two talk,” Seulgi insisted. “And don't you dare run away, either of you.”

 

      Joohyun sighed and looked at Sehun with a grimace. It wasn't so much an angry expression as it was an 'I don't want to do this either' expression. At least they could already come to terms on one thing. After a few minutes of unbearable silence, Sehun finally spoke up.

      “So...How have you been?”

 

      She stared into his eyes for a moment, and Sehun could tell she was trying to think of how to answer the question. Had he already messed things up by asking how she was?

      “I've been...not so good,” she admitted quietly. “You?”

      “About the same,” Sehun sighed, laughing a bit at the end.

 

      The smallest semblance of a smile graced Joohyun's face and Sehun felt like he could melt at the sight. He'd missed it so much. He'd missed her. Before they had started dating, they'd been friends, and that hadn't really changed throughout their relationship.

 

      Despite how much Sehun had missed her, keeping a conversation going was almost impossible. It wasn't that she was being hostile. It was just that neither of them really knew how to overcome the awkward wall that had formed between them. Sehun was thankful she wasn't screaming at him and throwing things anymore at least.

 

      After 15 minutes of uncomfortable small talk followed by large amounts of silence, Seulgi had finished cleaning up and was getting ready to lock up, so she shooed both of them out the door. The cold winter air might as well have smacked Sehun in the face, and he groaned. He heard Joohyun giggle beside him.

      “You've never been fond of the cold, have you?”

 

      He smiled at her and shrugged. Her expression gradually became sadder and she looked away. He felt her fingers gently grip the sleeve of his jacket.

      “It wasn't all a lie, right?” She practically whispered, voice desperate.

      “No,” Sehun answered soothingly, grabbing her hand.

      “You really loved me?”

      “I did. I loved you so much. You're still so important to me. I never wanted to hurt you...And I never wanted to two-time both you and Junmyeon, please believe me...”

      “Just tell me, were you seeing him behind my back?”

      “In a literal sense, yes, I was going to his house, but all we did was watch movies and cook really pathetic attempts at dinner.” Joohyun laughed quietly. “That kiss was the first thing we did that crossed the line...And it was a mistake. Honestly, I really regret letting it happen.”

      “Why?” Joohyun asked, looking surprised this time. “I thought you loved Junmyeon...” Sehun sighed and leaned against the wall of the cafe.

      “I do...But it wasn't right to do that while I was still dating you. You're right, I should have pushed him away. I'd wanted to spend Christmas with you, so any thought of him should have been pushed to the side until then. Instead I hurt us both...And I'm really sorry. You didn't deserve what I did to you.”

      “Thank you...for apologizing,” she whispered, leaning against the wall beside him. “I should apologize too. I overreacted and never let you explain yourself...And I never should have broken the picture frame or cut the bunny's ears...I'm so, so sorry...I'm ashamed of the way I acted.”

      “You were hurt and I wasn't able to explain it well to you.”

      “But still. I took it too far...”

      “I accept your apology,” Sehun said softly.

 

      There was a brief moment where neither of them talked, but this silence was much more pleasant than before. Joohyun leaned her head lightly on Sehun's arm.

      “This is really it for us now, isn't it?” She asked, voice shaking. Sehun looked down at her and noticed tears gathering in his eyes.

      “For our relationship, yes...”

      “I'm going to miss you,” she whispered, a quiet sob escaping at the end. “I really loved you.”

      “I loved you too.”

      “Do you think someday we'll be able to see each other again without it hurting? You mean so much to me, I don't want to lose you...”

      “If we could manage to do that, I would really like it,” Sehun said truthfully. “You're still really important to me.”

      “I'm not ready yet...In fact, I don't think I'm going to be able to see you again for a while...But someday, when I'm better, I hope we can meet and talk to each other like we used to...If you're still with Junmyeon, I'm sure I'll see you again in the future...” Sehun smiled sadly.

      “Junmyeon and I aren't together. I was rejected...But I think I'd like to see you again all the same.” Joohyun's eyes widened and she looked confused.

      “I would have thought...” She mumbled.

      “Junmyeon regretted it and told me he couldn't do it. I really dug my own grave, didn't I?”

      “Sehun...”

      “It's alright. It's not your place to be the one comforting me about this. After all, you were a victim too. Let's just both do our best from now on, alright?”

      “Yeah...”

 

      Seulgi, who had been standing off to the side after locking up the cafe, decided they'd more or less patched up what they could. She walked over slowly, glancing in between the two.

      “You two about done...?” She asked hesitantly. Sehun looked at Joohyun briefly, but she didn't meet his eyes. He frowned slightly and nodded.

      “Yeah, I think we are...”

      “Alright...We should probably get going then...” Seulgi suggested.

 

      Sehun stood up from the wall and took a step forward. Joohyun grabbed his hand timidly, and Sehun glanced back at her sadly. Her shoulders were shaking and Sehun knew she wasn't looking at him because she was trying to mask tears. He could feel tears prickling at his eyes as well. Saying goodbye to her was a lot harder than he'd imagined.

      “Will you hold me one last time...?” She asked so quietly Sehun almost didn't here it.

      “Of course,” he said, immediately wrapping his arms gently around her. It felt so foreign to him. He hadn't held her in so long.

 

      She pressed her face into his chest and quiet sobs escaped, muffled by the fabric of his sweater. He held her tighter, rocking her slightly like he'd done so many times in the past to comfort her, only this time it didn't make her feel any better. He could no longer give her what she wanted or needed, and they were both finally coming to terms with it.

      “I won't be beside you anymore, but I hope you'll continue moving forward and being the same amazing girl you've always been,” he mumbled into the top of her head. She let out a slightly louder sob in response. “You'll find someone who could give you everything that I couldn't. I know you will.”

 

      She wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly. All she could do in response to his words was cry. Sehun rubbed her back until she calmed down. When she'd managed to stop crying, she pulled away quickly, looking up at him with a forced smile.

      “Thank you for everything,” she said quietly.

      “Thank you,” Sehun responded. “I'm glad I met you, Joohyun...”

 

      She bit her lip and nodded, trying to keep herself under control. She wiped her eyes and Seulgi wrapped an arm around her waist to comfort her.

      “Thank you for the necklace by the way...” Joohyun added quietly. “It's beautiful. Do you mind if I keep it?”

      “Of course not,” Sehun answered, smiling gently. “Your cookies were amazing as well. I'll miss those too.” She let out a mix of a sob and a laugh.

      “Make sure you get Junmyeon to fix the bunny too. If he asks, just tell him it was my fault...”

 

      Sehun smiled bitterly. Somehow, he didn't see himself going to Junmyeon again any time soon, especially not with a mangled bunny stuffy. Seulgi must have noticed the uncomfortable topic change, because she quickly interjected before things could become negative again.

      “I think I'll take it from here,” she started. “We're gonna have a girl's night full of lots of crying and binge eating~” Joohyun nodded silently and Sehun smiled at Seulgi.

      “Thanks...Take care of her,” he mumbled. It wasn't his place to say it really, but he just wanted Joohyun to be alright.

 

      Joohyun sniffled and cleared her throat before letting out a shaky breath, then looked straight into his eyes. Using every last bit of fortitude she had, she said one last thing to him.

      “Goodbye, Sehun...”

      “Goodbye, Joohyun.”

 

      She offered him one last smile, this one managing to look much less forced than the last, then turned and started to walk away, Seulgi still attached at her hip. Sehun watched them leave, not moving until they were both out of his sight. It was officially over. He and Joohyun were done.

 

~*~

      Following the big breakup, Sehun's life seemed to go by in a blur. He was feeling better about the way things ended with Joohyun, but it still didn't make staying away from Junmyeon any easier. He wanted to respect the other man's wishes, but he also wanted to keep fighting. Junmyeon was being stubborn after all, why couldn't Sehun be as well?

 

      Seulgi was actually surprisingly encouraging about Sehun seeing Junmyeon again. As far as she was concerned, Junmyeon made Sehun happy and vice versa, so it was worth fighting to the bitter end. He'd already gone through so much, it was a shame to give up now. At least, that was what she always told him.

 

      Still, it was a little hard to talk to Junmyeon when the man was adamant about staying away. He never answered any of Sehun's calls or texts. The younger didn't know where he worked either, not that he would drop in unannounced at his work place. Sehun wasn't that desperate. Yet. He _did_ know where Junmyeon lived though. Perhaps it was time to pay a surprise visit to the man's apartment. If nothing else, he could have his final say on the matter.

 

      The problem was Sehun didn't know when Junmyeon worked, and coordinating with his own work schedule was hard. He decided the best way to catch Junmyeon would be on a weekday after he finished work. If he went on the weekend and Junmyeon wasn't working, there was a chance that the older man would ignore him entirely and not even answer his door once he saw it was Sehun. He would have to catch Junmyeon completely by surprise, which meant getting there before he did.

 

      The next weekday that Sehun got off work in the late afternoon, he headed over to Junmyeon's apartment. He knocked on the door when he got there, but received no response. As suspected, Junmyeon wasn't home yet. Sehun sighed and sat down, leaning against the door. He would have to wait now.

 

      He'd brought the bunny with him, in hopes that even if their talk went nowhere productive, he'd still be willing to fix it. He might even be able to use that as an excuse to get Junmyeon to talk to him in the first place. He snuggled it close as a cold gust of wind blew by. They were still in the heart of winter, so waiting outside wasn't exactly an ideal situation, but Sehun was willing to do anything to see Junmyeon again. He was that desperate.

 

      Unfortunately, waiting turned out to be a much longer process than Sehun had originally anticipated. Hours passed and the sun began setting in the sky and there was still no sign of Junmyeon. Sehun was huddled into a ball, shivering nonstop. The bunny had become the only source of warmth he had beyond his jacket, but even then, it did little to help. Sehun was just starting to consider giving up when finally Junmyeon walked up the steps to his apartment. He froze in place, eyes wide, when he spotted the younger curled up against his door.

      “Sehun...” He gasped.

      “Mind letting me in?” Sehun asked, shivering so much his voice even shook. Junmyeon nodded frantically.

      “Yeah!”

 

      He rushed over to the door and unlocked it. After, he helped Sehun to his feet, the latter being too cold and numb to get up on his own. This was why Sehun hated winter. Junmyeon helped him inside and shut the door, immediately cutting them off from the harsh terrain outside. Junmyeon left his side to turn on a few lights in his apartment. Sehun waited until his body thawed out slightly before chancing to move into the living room where Junmyeon was.

 

      The older man looked at him nervously. It was a bit saddening to realize how awkward things had managed to become between them in the small amount of time they'd spent apart. It probably didn't help that Junmyeon had no idea why Sehun was there.

      “How have you been?” Sehun asked, trying to fill the silence.

      “Working,” Junmyeon answered. “Why are you here?” It wasn't the least bit malicious, but it still hurt Sehun to hear the question asked in the first place.

      “I just want to talk to you again, Junmyeon...About everything.”

      “Sehun...” The other man sighed, and Sehun knew he was getting ready to argue again.

      “Please! Just hear me out...”

      “Fine. What do you want to say?”

      “Joohyun and I talked again,” Sehun started, unsure of why he was so nervous all of a sudden. It just felt like everything was riding on his choice of words here.

      “How did it go?”

      “We broke up...Properly this time. No screaming, no fighting. We talked civilly like adults.”

      “I see...”

      “Please don't think this is your fault...I'm the one who fell for you. I'm the one who chose to end it with Joohyun. I'm the one that still wants to be with you.”

      “I still seduced you out of a relationship...”

      “Well, that's a rather dramatic way of putting it,” Sehun joked. “But you could have just stood there and I still would have found you attractive. We could have sat on opposite ends of the room and I still would have enjoyed your presence. All you had to do was breathe, Junmyeon, and I'm pretty sure I still would have found a way to fall in love with you.”

      “And you were telling me I was dramatic...”

      “I want to be with you,” Sehun repeated fervently, taking a step closer to Junmyeon. “I love you...”

 

      Junmyeon looked at him in a mixture of emotions. Sehun could tell he wanted to be with him too. But there was so much hesitance and fear in Junmyeon's eyes. Eventually he looked down with a sigh.

      “I'm grateful that you feel that way...and that you were able to properly talk things out with Joohyun...But I just can't, Sehun...”

      “Why? Because I was once your sister's boyfriend I'm completely off-limits?”

      “I don't know! But when my sister cried her eyes out and told me she didn't want to see me again, it feels pretty shitty to just ignore that and date you!” Junmyeon snapped, surprising Sehun. “I can't get over this as easily as you did.”

      “It wasn't easy,” Sehun argued. “It hurt both of us...But I'm not going to let it stop me from being with you. I love you, Junmyeon. You've got to decide whether you're willing to move on or not...”

 

      Junmyeon looked down once more. There was silence in the room, and Sehun realized that he wasn't going to get a response. The silence _was_ his answer. Sehun bit his lip, nodding slightly, letting reality sink in once more. He'd said what he could. If Junmyeon still refused, that was just how things were going to be. Sehun would have to move on.

      “I understand,” he whispered, and Junmyeon looked up at him in a mixture of guilt and confusion. “I'll leave you alone, but first...Could you at least fix Junnie?”

 

      Sehun held the bunny up, showing Junmyeon the half-unraveled ears. Junmyeon's eyes widened and he rushed over, grabbing the bunny delicately from Sehun. The younger could tell Junmyeon was disappointed and hurt, seeing something he worked so hard on in this state.

      “What happened!?”

      “He had an accident.”

      “I can see that, but...”

      “Can you fix him, please? You don't have to see me again in order to give him back to me. You can just leave it in the mailbox for my apartment...I just really want to be able to hug him without worrying that his ears will fall off.”

      “Alright...”

      “I'm gonna go then...Bye, Junmyeon.”

      “Goodbye, Sehun...”

 

      The younger took a few steps backwards, eyes still lingering on Junmyeon. This would probably be the last good look he got of the man, so he wanted to commit it to memory. Finally, he turned and walked away, leaving the warmth of the house and Junmyeon behind. The cold seemed to bite even more as he walked home. He'd never really warmed up from before either. He _really_ hated winter.

 

~*~

      Joohyun watched her mother sigh as she hung up the phone. The woman had been trying to get together with Junmyeon for some time, especially since he never showed up for their New Years party, but he always had something going on. Now it seemed he was pouring his everything into work. Joohyun wondered if that was actually the case or if he was just making excuses.

 

      Ever since she and Sehun had broken up, Joohyun had had a lot of time to reflect on everything. It might have been naive and too soft of her, but she'd already forgiven Sehun. It still hurt a lot and it would for a while, but she'd at least found the closure she needed. She hadn't really fixed things with her brother though. As far as he knew, he was still hated by her.

 

      She didn't think she could hate Junmyeon though, even after he kissed her boyfriend. She really was a soft idiot, but she missed her big brother. She wanted him to be happy as well. Junmyeon was the type to beat himself up over his shortcomings, so he was no doubt still beating himself up over everything that happened. Joohyun decided it was finally time for a peace offering.

 

      She headed over to his house the following Saturday. She'd tried calling him, but he didn't pick up, so she decided to come anyway, hoping he wouldn't have guests over or turn her away. She had a feeling he was being stubborn more than anything else.

 

      When she knocked on his door, she heard footsteps approaching quickly. She took a deep breath and put on as gentle a smile as she could muster. The door opened and Junmyeon stood there with his mouth slightly agape.

      “Joohyun...What are you doing here...?”

      “You didn't answer my calls,” she said sheepishly. “Can I come in?”

      “Y-Yeah...”

 

      Junmyeon opened the door and Joohyun entered. She slipped off her shoes and walked to his living room. Junmyeon followed behind cautiously. Joohyun leaned against the back of his sofa and sighed, glancing around the room.

      “It feels like forever since I've been here,” she mumbled more to herself than to him. “You always used to come over to our house to visit...”

      “Joohyun, is something wrong?” Junmyeon asked. “Did mom need something? Is this about the cake pan?” Joohyun couldn't help the small giggle that escaped.

      “No, it's not about the cake pan. It's about us...”

      “Ok...What about us?”

      “Sit down on the couch with me. It feels awkward talking like this.”

 

      Joohyun walked around to the other side and plopped down. Junmyeon hesitantly headed over and sat down beside her. He hadn't expected Joohyun to show up at his door, especially not in as good a mood as she was in. This whole situation felt almost surreal. Almost like things were normal between them again.

 

      They sat in silence for a while. Junmyeon was tapping his foot anxiously, waiting for Joohyun to start speaking. She seemed to be taking her time to collect her thoughts. Finally, she cocked her head to the side when she noticed a bunny without any ears on the coffee table and a ball of gray yarn and started project beside it. She smiled sadly and sighed.

      “Ah, this is um...Just something that someone asked me to fix up,” Junmyeon supplied in the silence.

      “I know. It's Sehun's right? I was the one that ruined it...”

      “Oh...” Junmyeon mumbled.

      “So I guess he saw you again, right?” Joohyun asked.

 

      Junmyeon said nothing, but nodded. Another uncomfortable silence overtook the room. Joohyun glanced over at Junmyeon, noting how his fingers were gripping at his pant leg and shaking.

      “Isn't it sad how awkward it's gotten between us?” She mumbled. “We used to talk to each other about everything, even really embarrassing things, and now we can't even say 5 sentences to each other.”

      “I don't know what to say,” Junmyeon responded, not looking her in the eyes.

      “And that's part of the problem, isn't it?” She laughed. “Can we talk about what happened?”

      “We can talk about whatever you want...”

      “I'm sorry for what I said to you. Asking you to stay away from your own family was wrong of me.”

      “It's alright...”

      “No, it's not,” Joohyun sighed. “I was really hard on you and even harder on Sehun. I set things right with him, so I want to do that with you.”

      “What's there to set right? I was the one that kissed your boyfriend. I got what was coming.”

      “I was always insecure around you, did you know? You were attractive and talented and kind. I always felt like I was in your shadow.”

      “How could you think that? Do you not realize how talented and beautiful you are?”

      “It's something that's hard for me,” Joohyun admitted. “I guess losing Sehun was just another insecurity weighing me down and I took it out on you. I mean, you _did_ kiss him so you weren't completely without fault. But when I lost him, all I could think was 'what does he have that I don't?' Even now, I'm not sure what it is...But I know now that comparing myself won't do any good. Sehun doesn't love me that way anymore, and that's the end of it.”

      “I'm sorry...”

      “Sehun told me that he never wanted to cheat on me with you. He said he'd wanted to give me one last good date together on Christmas before breaking up with me. I honestly should have seen it coming. I could tell our relationship was changing, but I chose to ignore it. Instead I just got upset and jealous.”

      “You had the right to be...”

      “Maybe. I shouldn't have said those hurtful things to you or Sehun though. I can tell they really affected you. After all, you haven't been home in almost a month and you wouldn't even answer my phone calls...I miss my big brother, Junmyeon.” She placed her hand on top of his, feeling it relax slightly.

      “I miss you too,” he whispered, lacing their fingers together. Joohyun smiled at him once more.

      “Even though what you did was really uncool and it hurt a lot, I still want you to be happy...So don't hold yourself back because of me. Sehun and I couldn't make it work, but you still might be able to.”

      “I don't know,” Junmyeon sighed. “Every time I think of him, I remember what an awful thing I did...I can't bring myself to get past it.”

      “How do you feel about him though? Did he make you happy?” She received a small nod. “Do you love him?”

      “Yes,” Junmyeon muttered, guilt and affection in his voice. Joohyun smiled.

      “Then there's your answer. You need to stop thinking about other people and think about yourself for once.”

      “The last time I did that, I ruined little sister's relationship.” Joohyun rolled her eyes.

      “We were already a mess before the kiss. It made you happy right? Kissing Sehun.”

      “Happier than I've been in a long time.”

      “Then don't let it go! You won't meet a guy like Sehun very often, trust me!”

      “But what about you?”

      “I'll be fine. Besides, it'll give me a reason to see Sehun again someday. We both deserve to be happy, Junmyeon. And so does Sehun. Don't hurt him anymore, ok?”

      “Thank you...You really are the best sister.”

      “Damn right!” Joohyun agreed, laughing at the end.

 

      She leaned her head on Junmyeon's shoulder and squeezed his hand. He let go only to wrap his arm around her shoulder and pull her close for a hug. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.

      “I missed you,” he mumbled into her hair.

      “I missed you too!”

 

      They snuggled for a short while, not really talking about anything. Joohyun was amazed that she wasn't more upset. She'd gone to make peace, but she'd anticipated feeling a lot less content with it. Perhaps she'd already forgiven Junmyeon as well. She really was too soft for her own good. She just wanted them all to be happy, whatever that entailed.

 

      When they broke apart, Joohyun readjusted herself on the couch so she was facing Junmyeon. He continued to work on remaking the bunny ears as she gabbed at him, catching up on the lost time. As her throat got sore, she decided to work on something alongside him, borrowing some of his yarn. They really were like old people at heart. She'd missed having a crafting buddy though.

 

      She finally left towards the evening as the sun was starting to set. Junmyeon offered her a ride, but she decided she'd rather walk. Contrary to her now ex-boyfriend, Joohyun really liked winter time. She gave Junmyeon one last hug and a few words of encouragement before heading home.

 

      She hadn't felt this at peace in a long time. Being angry was so exhausting. The sting was still there when she thought of Junmyeon and Sehun, but she was learning to cope with it. In the end, she genuinely wanted them to figure things out. The sooner they could put everything behind them, the better. Perhaps she was being naive and simplistic again, but she couldn't help it. She loved them both too much to stay angry at them forever.


	5. Chapter 5

      In the days following Sehun's visit to Junmyeon, he could feel himself slowly coming down with a cold. He'd been outside in the cold for hours after all. He probably should have expected it. Still, he had things to do and a job to work, so he did his best to try and fight the cold. He went to bed early, took extra vitamins, drank lots of tea and other warm drinks, but it was no use. Towards the end of his shift on his final day of work that week, he finally succumbed.

 

      It was Seulgi that noticed how out of it and exhausted Sehun seemed, in addition to being rather flushed and sniffling throughout the day. She hadn't wanted him making any of the drinks, and he completely understood her reasoning, so she put him on clean up duty whenever it needed to be done. When the cafe had calmed down at one point, Seulgi gently placed her hand on Sehun's forehead, frowning.

      “You've got a fever. You need to go home.”

      “My shift ends in 5 minutes,” Sehun sighed. “Just let me stand here for the last few minutes then I'll clock out when I'm supposed to.”

      “Alright...No making drinks though. Period. And you've been washing your hands a lot, right?”

      “We work in a cafe. I tend to wash them a lot anyways.”

      “Just making sure...”

      “I'm not an idiot, Seulgi.”

      “I know...I'm just worried about you. Jeez, see if I care from now on.”

 

      Sehun laughed and leaned his head on top of hers tiredly. It was throbbing and even the slightest change in elevation or angle made it worse. All he wanted was to go home and close his eyes. A nice warm blanket would be good too. He knew it was because of his fever, but he'd been shivering for a while now. To his dismay, another person entered the cafe.

      “Welcome!” He and Seulgi greeted together, though the former was hardly enthusiastic about it.

 

      Sehun hadn't been looking up at the time when the person came in, but Seulgi visibly tensed beside him. He furrowed his brow and glanced up, trying to repress a groan as pain shot through his head. His jaw dropped when he saw the person standing in front of the counter.

      “Junmyeon...” Seulgi mumbled, looking at him with wide eyes. “It's been a while since you've been here. What's up?”

      “I, uh, thought I'd order some coffee,” the older man answered, side eyeing Sehun several times. The latter was too tired and dazed to really notice, but Seulgi got the message and nodded.

      “Alright, what can I get for you?”

 

      She took his order and asked him to have a seat at a table when he was done paying. After, she set to work on making his drink and forced Sehun to clock out of work. It was past his allotted shift and the other person who would be replacing him would be there in minutes. She pointed to the table where Junmyeon was sitting and Sehun pouted.

      “Why?”

      “He's obviously here to see you, so go! Face your problems, Sehun!”

      “But I can barely hold my head up...”

      “Go sit and I'll make you some tea, my treat.”

      “Fine...”

 

      Sehun walked around to the other side of the counter and sat timidly across from Junmyeon. He rested his arms on the table and leaned his chin on his palms, mostly in an attempt to hold his head up because it felt way too heavy for his neck to properly handle it. Junmyeon didn't seem bothered by the action.

      “So how have you been?” Sehun mumbled awkwardly.

      “Well enough. Busy with work. Trying and failing to be social. You?”

      “Just trying to get through the days,” the younger sighed.

 

      He hadn't meant to sound dramatic, but his head _really_ hurt and it genuinely felt like a battle just being awake. Junmyeon laughed and gave Sehun a warm smile. It made his chest clench slightly. He'd almost gotten used to not seeing it anymore, but he'd missed it terribly.

 

      Having a conversation with Junmyeon had become almost as hard as it had with Joohyun. The again, Sehun had a feeling that was probably because his brain felt like mush and thinking was physically impossible for him at the time. Thankfully, Junmyeon seemed to have his own agenda for the visit. He leaned over, digging something out of a bag that Sehun hadn't noticed until then. Junmyeon placed a familiar bunny plushy on the table, its ears good as new and perked up. Sehun immediately grabbed it.

      “Junnie!” He exclaimed quietly, snuggling it close and resting his cheek on its head.

 

      He was acting like an excited child, which normally would have embarrassed him to do in public, but he was sick now so he decided cut himself some slack. Junmyeon just chuckled and smiled affectionately.

      “Thank you so much,” Sehun stated, remembering his manners. Junmyeon shook his head.

      “I was happy to fix him for you. It gave me another chance to see you as well...”

 

      Sehun's heart leapt slightly. Junmyeon wasn't usually one to talk like that, especially not in the most recent times Sehun had visited him. It was filling Sehun with a small amount of hope though, and he didn't want it. Not if Junmyeon would just crash it down again later.

      “Why would you want to see me again? Didn't you already reject me twice?” Sehun asked. He would blame his bluntness on his sickness as well.

      “About that...” Junmyeon mumbled, intertwining his fingers on the table and twiddling his thumbs nervously. “I've been doing a lot of thinking...And I also talked to Joohyun about it.”

      “You talked to her again? Are you two ok?”

      “Probably not, but I don't think we're as bad as we were before.”

      “That's good, I guess...What did she say?”

      “She said that we all deserved to be happy...That you and I deserved to be happy too...”

      “Oh...I see...That was nice of her...”

      “I've thought about it a lot, Sehun. You make me really happy. Happier than I've been in years. I know I hurt you with how fickle I was being, so I understand if you don't want to, but would you be willing to give me another chance?”

 

      Sehun stared at Junmyeon with wide eyes. That had snapped him out of whatever feverish daze he'd been in before. Was he actually hearing things right? Junmyeon wanted another chance? Did that mean he wanted to be in a relationship with Sehun? It did, right? Was he having some wild dream after passing out on the floor of the cafe? He _may_ have pinched himself just to be sure. This was not a dream.

      “Another chance at what?” Sehun asked, wanting it very clearly spelled out for him before he let himself get excited.

      “Another chance at you, I guess,” Junmyeon answered cheekily.

 

      If Sehun weren't sick, he probably would have pounced across the table and kissed him. Or at least hugged him. Sudden kisses didn't tend to end well for them.

      “So what do you say?” Junmyeon asked nervously. “Will you give me another chance?”

      “Do you love me?” Sehun wanted to hear it with his own two ears, not infer it.

      “Yes. I love you, Sehun. Will you go out with me?”

 

      Junmyeon's expression was so gentle and his voice was unwavering. There wasn't any hesitation in his eyes, just eagerness and affection. Sehun had wanted this so bad. He'd finally started getting used to the idea of giving it up. He wasn't going to complain about dropping that mentality though. In the end, he'd never stopped loving Junmyeon.

      “Yes,” Sehun finally answered. “I will.”

 

      Junmyeon's face lit up, eyes curling into crescents as he flashed a toothy grin. Sehun really wished he weren't sick so he could smother Junmyeon in kisses, suddenness be damned. The last thing he wanted was to get Junmyeon sick though, so he resisted. Thankfully, Seulgi had impeccable timing, and brought their drinks to them at that moment. At least it would give Sehun something to do instead of passing all his germs to Junmyeon.

      “Here are the drinks,” she hummed. “Wendy's here now, so go home and rest, Sehun, ok? Seriously!”

 

      The boy hummed in response. He was way too giddy to even think about resting now, although his head still _really_ hurt. Junmyeon furrowed his brow and looked between Sehun and Seulgi.

      “Is everything alright?” He asked Seulgi.

      “The idiot's been fighting a cold except not really because he overworked himself,” she stated simply, not mincing words and earning a pout from Sehun. “He's feverish and he needs to go home and sleep. Do you think you could give him a ride back? I'm not sure I'm comfortable with him walking home like this.”

      “Of course! I wouldn't let him walk home in this state either!”

 

      Junmyeon immediately got up from his seat, walking around Seulgi so that he could get to Sehun. He carefully pulled the boy to his feet, holding him steady as Sehun wobbled. His head felt like it was spinning so much it would fall off his body at any second. Somehow Sehun managed to hold his tea without spilling any of it through all of this.

 

      Junmyeon wrapped Sehun's arm around his shoulder and planted his hand firmly on Sehun's waist. It had been so long since Sehun had felt Junmyeon this close to him. He never wanted to lose this feeling ever again. Junmyeon slung his bag over his free shoulder and grabbed his drink. Seulgi walked with them slowly over to the door and held it open for them. On the way out, she patted Junmyeon on the back and muttered a quick thanks.

 

      Junmyeon lead Sehun over to his car, then lowered him into the passenger's seat. Sehun whined when the older man left his side and shut the door. He was really cold and Junmyeon was the closest thing he had to a blanket or a heater. The other man got in the driver's side and instantly started up the car. Sehun had never been so thankful for a car heater before. He felt a hand rub his thigh gently.

      “Do you want to go to your house or mine?” Junmyeon asked softly. Sehun looked at him in dazed confusion.

      “What...?”

      “I'm not gonna just dump you off at home. I'm taking care of you for the evening, so pick a place. Yours or mine?”

      “Yours,” Sehun answered, not really thinking about it. It was just the first option Junmyeon had said, so it seemed like the easiest.

      “Alright. Just hang in there a little longer.”

      “Will you hold my hand?”

 

      Sehun hadn't really thought about the logistics of the question, specifically that Junmyeon needed to drive. The older man smiled at him and started the car, backing out of the parking space. Sehun let out a small, disappointed sigh, and leaned his head against the window. Holding his head up was starting to feel like too much effort.

 

      He felt Junmyeon flick his thigh lightly and Sehun painstakingly looked over, blinking a few times so he could focus. Junmyeon's hand was extended, palm up. Junmyeon waved his fingers a few times and Sehun finally realized he was supposed to actually hold his hand. He placed his own on top of Junmyeon's and the other man intertwined their fingers. After, their hands rested on Sehun's thigh, Junmyeon's thumb rubbing comforting circles on the other's skin, for the rest of the drive back to Junmyeon's apartment. Sehun felt like his cheeks had gotten even hotter, as if that were even possible. He could get used to Junmyeon pampering him like this.

 

      Junmyeon only let go of his hand when they'd pulled into a parking spot in front of his apartment and he needed to park the car. At that point, Junmyeon got out and walked around to Sehun's side, opening the door and helping the boy to his feet. Sehun was actually somewhat alarmed at how badly the world span around him. Was his fever _that_ bad?

 

      Junmyeon held him firmly as they walked away from the car and up the steps to his door. Sehun was clinging to both the bunny and Junmyeon, empty tea cup discarded in a trash nearby courtesy of the other man. Junmyeon somehow managed to unlock his door while holding his own not-quite-empty drink, Sehun, and the keys to his apartment, then stumbled inside.

 

      He instantly brought Sehun over to his couch and let the boy flop down on it ungracefully with a groan. At that point, he set his drink on the coffee table then took Sehun's shoes off. Sehun curled up in a ball, mostly trying to keep himself warm. Junmyeon came back seconds later with the thick, warm blanket they always cuddled under to watch movies. He tucked Sehun in underneath it, briefly feeling his forehead with his hand before brushing Sehun's bangs out of his face. The younger sighed contentedly. If he weren't so sick, he would definitely be kissing Junmyeon's face off. Instead, he would let himself be pampered by him. He was just a _little_ spoiled when he was sick.

 

      Junmyeon didn't seem to care about that though. Instead, he brushed Sehun's bangs off his forehead so he could lean down and kiss it. Sehun felt his face flush again, but this time was from happiness rather than bashfulness. Junmyeon left his side and went to the kitchen. Sehun could hear the clanking of pots and the sound of running water. Junmyeon must have been making something to eat.

 

      Junmyeon came back later with a bowl of soup. He made Sehun sit up, which the latter was not happy about, then spoon-fed him, smiling and kissing his forehead every so often. Sehun was definitely flustered about this kind of treatment, but it was still heavenly. Junmyeon was actual perfection, and he was finally Sehun's.

 

      Junmyeon brought the dishes back to the sink, then returned to the couch, sitting at the end near Sehun's head. He looked at the boy sympathetically and sighed, then placed one of the couch pillows on his lap and patted it.

      “Come here.”

 

      Sehun didn't need to be told twice. He picked his head up long enough to crawl over to the man's lap, bunny tucked under his arm, and immediately planted himself on the pillow. He was staring forward, eyes focused blankly on the TV in front of him. It wasn't even on, but Sehun was too tired to focus on anything more interesting. Junmyeon ran his fingers through Sehun's hair once more, smiling gently.

      “I'm sick because you made me wait,” Sehun pouted.

      “I'm sorry,” Junmyeon whispered, laughing quietly. “I'll make sure you get better.”

      “My head hurts...”

      “You should get some sleep. That'll help.”

      “What about you?”

      “I'll put a movie on. Maybe I'll sleep too.”

      “Sitting up?”  
      “Never underestimate an overworked accountant's ability to sleep in sitting position.” Sehun giggled and placed his hand on Junmyeon's thigh.

      “You'll be here when I wake up, right?”

      “It'd be hard for me to leave if you're on top of me,” Junmyeon teased. “But yes, I'll be here.”

      “I love you,” Sehun mumbled, snuggling closer. Junmyeon was so damn warm.

      “I love you too,” the other man hummed.

 

      Sehun was so happy. He felt like shit and like his head would explode if he moved it, but he was so damn happy. He wouldn't let go of Junmyeon again. With the way the other man was treating him, he hoped that sentiment was mutual.

 

      Junmyeon turned on the television and started watching a show that he had to catch up on. Sehun passed out within the first five minutes, lulled by Junmyeon's warmth and gentle laughter every so often as something stupid happened in the show. When he woke up again, it was much later, but Junmyeon was still right there, hand running up and down his back this time. Junmyeon cooked some more food, this time for both of them, and he spent the rest of the night looking after Sehun, eventually bringing him to his room so they could both sleep.

 

      Sehun was too dazed to really appreciate seeing Junmyeon's room for the first time, but he had a feeling he would be seeing it a lot more from now on. He looked forward to those opportunities. For now, he took comfort in snuggling into the older man's chest, feeling the latter's arm wrap around him and hold him close. Even with a pounding head and a high fever, Sehun had no trouble sleeping beside Junmyeon that night.

 

~*~

      It took a few days for Sehun's fever to break. He wound up having to call in sick to a couple of shifts, which would have really bummed him out, were it not for the fact that he was staying at Junmyeon's house and the older man was spoiling him rotten. If getting sick meant an extended stay at Junmyeon's house complete with his undivided attention when he wasn't working, Sehun might not mind it so much.

 

      When he was finally better, he returned to his own apartment. It felt smaller than before, mostly because Junmyeon's was bigger, but it was still home, sweet home. Sehun missed being with Junmyeon though. He knew they would be seeing each other a lot more now that they were dating, but it was still disappointing to have to go home each time. At least there was always a 'next time' attached to each goodbye kiss.

 

      Dating Junmyeon was hardly any different than what they were doing before. Everything was just increased in value, really. They saw each other far more often and the amount of touching and snuggling increased. The biggest difference was Junmyeon was a kisser, and a good one at that. More often than not, Sehun found their lips pressed together, Junmyeon taking the lead. Hands often wandered and bodies were pressed together.

 

      His relationship with Junmyeon was a lot more physical than his last one had been. Not to say that it was _only_ physical or that it was a bad thing. Junmyeon was just a much more physical person than Joohyun had been, and Sehun really liked that. Junmyeon was invited over to Sehun's house a lot sooner than Joohyun had been as well. It was like they just couldn't get enough of each other. Sehun really hoped that feeling never faded.

 

      Despite all this, there were plenty of times where Sehun simply found himself sitting across Junmyeon chatting away, or 'watching' a movie while attempting once more to learn how to craft at least _something_. Ultimately, they did any number of things, just so long as they were together.

 

      With how physical they were to begin with, it didn't take very long for them to take their relationship to the next level. They frequently spent the night at each other houses, so late night wandering hands were not uncommon. It wasn't until well over a month in their relationship that things went further.

 

      Sehun had been sleeping over at Junmyeon's house that evening. The older man was spooning him, arm draped over his waist. It was Junmyeon's favorite way to sleep, Sehun had found. He rather liked it too. Junmyeon was warmer than any blanket after all. Sehun had just started drifting off when he felt Junmyeon's hand slip lower, beneath the band of his underwear. They both slept in nothing but a shirt and underwear, so it made things like this easy and all the more enticing.

 

      Sehun smiled and let out a half-hum, half-moan as Junmyeon started to stroke his length, slow and teasingly. Junmyeon planted soft kisses on Sehun's nape and exposed shoulders, sucking at the spots that he knew were sensitive. Junmyeon had learned an awful lot about Sehun's body pretty quickly, now that the younger thought about it.

 

      Sehun pushed his hips backwards, playfully brushing against Junmyeon's nether region. Two could play at this game. Sehun heard Junmyeon groan, voice low and lips centimeters from Sehun's ear, playing with a bit sensitive skin behind it. Sehun shuddered as Junmyeon proceeded to gently bite his earlobe, hot breath ghosting over equally hot flesh.

      “I want you,” he whispered. “All of you.”

 

      Junmyeon was always somewhat vague rather than blunt when it came to asking for sexual 'favors,' but Sehun didn't need to work hard to figure out what he wanted. Junmyeon wanted to go all the way, not just touching, and Sehun was more than willing to oblige. He hummed once more, pressing his body against Junmyeon's clothed erection.

      “I want you too,” he muttered, voice low and smooth.

 

      That was all Junmyeon needed to hear before sliding Sehun's underwear down to his thighs, resuming his stroking more vigorously. He sucked at his neck, grinding against him in rhythm with his strokes. Sehun let out guttural moans and thrust into the other's hand. Junmyeon would occasionally tease the tip with his finger, causing Sehun to whimper in response. He was so sensitive to Junmyeon's every move, it was ridiculous.

 

      Junmyeon stopped long enough to lean over Sehun and reach into his bedside table drawer to pull out some lube. Sehun's eyes followed the bottle and he turned onto his back, watching as Junmyeon slowly coated his fingers with the content inside. Sehun took that time to slip out of his shirt and kick his underwear the rest of the way down his legs, then spread them to give Junmyeon better access. He shuddered as Junmyeon loomed over him, eyes burning with desire. His finger teased his entrance, circling the rim. Sehun took a sharp breath, his body practically trembling with anticipation as Junmyeon slid his finger in painstakingly slow.

 

      Junmyeon leaned back over, connecting their lips once more as he carefully thrust his finger into Sehun. He would bite and tug on Sehun's bottom lip, reveling how soft and plump it was. His other hand gradually found Sehun's member again, and the latter was moaning into his mouth in a matter of seconds.

 

      Junmyeon added another finger and began stretching him. His lips trailed from Sehun's

lips down his jaw and neck. He sucked at some of the flesh on Sehun's clavicle, and the boy whimpered, body arching and trembling because there was so much going on and it all felt so overwhelmingly good. Junmyeon's lips trailed lower and Sehun thought for a brief moment that they were going to engulf his member, but instead, they settled on the flesh of one of his thighs, kissing and biting at the soft skin, leaving small marks.

 

      Junmyeon added another digit and Sehun wasn't sure he would last through the whole thing with how good it felt. He was already a mess of cries and moans underneath the older man. He glanced at Junmyeon's still-clothed erection and he could tell the man was aching to be touched, but he was giving his undivided attention and care to Sehun. God, he loved Junmyeon so damn much.

 

      Finally, after Sehun's thighs had small red marks sprinkled across the soft skin and Sehun's body accepted his fingers with ease, Junmyeon slid them out. Sehun sat up slightly, watching as Junmyeon stripped his garments. The man breathed a sigh of relief as he slid off his underwear, his erection no longer stifled. Sehun sat up the rest of the way, pressing his body against Junmyeon's and reaching for his length, giving it a slow pump.

      “My turn,” he whispered into Junmyeon's ear, and he felt the man shiver in his arms.

 

      Sehun worked slow, though not as agonizingly slow as Junmyeon had. The man in his arms leaned his head on Sehun's shoulder and gripped his arm, fingernails digging into Sehun's skin with each stroke of his hand. Finally, he pulled himself away from Sehun, looking at him with hooded eyes.

      “Condom,” Junmyeon whispered. “Now.”

 

      Sehun nodded and immediately reached for the box in the drawer, pulling one out and ripping the package open. He slid it on Junmyeon's length, feeling the man's hot, shaky breath against the skin of his neck. Sehun poured some of the lube onto his hand and gave Junmyeon a few more pumps, slicking the condom up. After, he laid back down, propped up on his elbows so he could see the other man clearly.

 

      Junmyeon aligned himself with Sehun's entrance, shifting one of the boy's legs over his shoulder. Sehun watched as he pushed in slowly, filling him up. He threw his head back as soon as Junmyeon was buried to the hilt. His body was aching for him to _move_. Junmyeon seemed to realize what Sehun wanted because soon enough, he slid out only to ram back into him.

 

      Junmyeon gripped at Sehun's thigh, pressing his fingers into the soft skin as he continued to pound into him, slowly at first, but gradually gaining speed. Sehun let his back fall the rest of the way onto the bed, and he gripped at the sheets, needing something to ground him. Junmyeon felt so good inside him. Each time it felt like he somehow managed to go deeper and deeper, leaving Sehun a vulnerable, moaning mess underneath him.

 

      Junmyeon seemed to have a good sense of Sehun's body, even though this was their first time together, because as soon as he found an angle or particular spot that left Sehun reeling, he was able to exploit it repeatedly. His precision was something from out of this world, Sehun decided. Junmyeon really was perfect.

 

      When he hit Sehun's prostate, the latter cried out in ecstasy. He reached for Junmyeon, wanting nothing more than to hold him. Junmyeon let Sehun's leg slip from his shoulder and leaned forward so the boy could wrap his arms shakily around his neck, fingers digging into his back and tangling in his hair. Junmyeon continued to thrust into Sehun's prostate, and it wasn't long before Sehun was driven over the edge, cum spilling over his own stomach and Junmyeon's.

      “I love you,” he gasped, pressing Junmyeon as close as he possibly could.

 

      The older man kept thrusting into him, Sehun's body tightening around him as he rode out his orgasm. A few more thrusts and extra friction sent Junmyeon into his own orgasm, groaning into the crook of Sehun's neck. They laid there for a brief moment, panting hard and trying to regain their grip on the world around them.

 

      Finally, Junmyeon pushed himself up on his hands, staring down at Sehun. His lips were red and swollen and his stomach soiled in white. His entire body was trembling, covered in a layer of sweat, giving his skin the most beautiful glow. Sehun's eyes were hooded, still full of passion and desire. Junmyeon brushed his hand through the boy's messy, damp hair.

      “God, you're so beautiful,” Junmyeon breathed. “I love you so much.”

 

      Sehun reached up for Junmyeon's neck, pulling him back down for a kiss. This time it wasn't hungry or desperate. It was passionate, expressing everything that Sehun felt for the other man. Junmyeon was so precious to him and he never wanted to lose this. He was Sehun's whole world now.

 

      Joonmyun slid out of Sehun, disposing of the condom and heading to his bathroom to grab a warm washcloth. After, he came back and gently cleaned Sehun, like he would break if Junmyeon pressed too hard. Sehun wasn't sure what he loved more, Junmyeon pounding into him roughly, or Junmyeon treating him with the utmost care and attention. In the end, they were both _his_ Junmyeon, so he was pretty damn lucky.

 

      Junmyeon threw the washcloth in his hamper and laid down on the bed beside Sehun, pulling the covers back over them. Neither bothered to get dressed again. Instead, Sehun just snuggled against Junmyeon, nose pressed to his chest, inhaling his scent. Two warm, strong arms wrapped around him, and Sehun felt pure bliss.

      “I love you,” he mumbled sleepily once more into Junmyeon's chest.

      “I love you too,” the other man hummed in response. “Goodnight, Sehun.”

      “Night.”

 

      Sehun didn't have any trouble sleeping. He never did when he was with Junmyeon. Something about the man put Sehun at ease. It wasn't just how warm he was. It was also how welcoming Junmyeon's entire being was. Everything just felt so right with him.

 

~*~

      Time seemed to fly when Sehun was with Junmyeon. Winter finally passed and they celebrated their birthdays together in spring. Soon enough, summer had arrived and they'd been dating for almost half a year. Sehun had finally saved up enough to start school, so he was going to take full advantage of his summer and see Junmyeon as much as possible. It was becoming a common occurrence for Sehun to spend more time in Junmyeon's apartment than his own. The older man never seemed to mind though.

 

      There were times Junmyeon would get bogged down with work, and he would have to take it home, even when Sehun was over. Sehun was always understanding of his situation and usually let him work, cheering him on from the side. He would even reward him for finishing a particularly taxing report with a blowjob or some fun in the bedroom if Junmyeon was up for it. Sehun considered it to be a pretty mutually beneficial arrangement.

 

      Date nights were probably his favorite though. Sometimes they would go out to eat dinner or even do some minor shopping. Other times they would curl up on Junmyeon's couch and watch a movie. Depending on the choice of film, they would either make a bowl of popcorn and watch intently, or make out while the movie played unnoticed in the background. Sehun wasn't entirely sure which type of film he preferred.

 

      This particular date night wasn't any different. Junmyeon had just finished a report that had kept him up for nights, and he'd finally managed to recover the sleep, so Sehun suggested they watch a new romance comedy that they'd missed out on when it was in theaters. Junmyeon of course had no objections.

 

      Summer was in full swing now. Junmyeon's apartment had decent air conditioning, but the sticky heat of summer still lingered in the air. As such, Junmyeon was a little less cuddly than usual, since he wasn't particularly fond of sweating, so he and Sehun settled on sitting beside each other on the couch. At least that was the initial plan.

 

      Junmyeon had sprawled out on the couch, not really leaving any room for Sehun. The younger had tried to pull his feet off, but Junmyeon whined and kicked his hands away. Sehun sighed, placing his hands on his hips.

      “Why are you like this?” He pouted.

      “I'm tired,” Junmyeon whined playfully. “I don't wanna move.”

      “Junmyeoooon!” A beep went off in the kitchen and Sehun glanced over.

      “The popcorn's done. Go get it for me?” Junmyeon singsonged. Sehun rolled his eyes and walked over to the microwave, grumbling under his breath.

      “You're 26 now. Why are you acting like a child? You've got 5 years on me, _I_ should be the child!” He complained, pouring the popcorn into a bowl.

      “I've got 5 years on you so you should respect me,” Junmyeon argued.

      “I do respect you,” Sehun huffed, walking back over and handing Junmyeon the bowl. “But I'd also like to sit next to you. That too much to ask?”

      “No, I guess not,” Junmyeon sighed dramatically, sitting up so Sehun had room on the couch.

 

      Sehun rolled his eyes again and walked over to one of Junmyeon's craft shelves. He pulled out knitting needles and grabbed the bag he'd brought over earlier that day. It contained the pink and gray yarn he'd bought almost half a year ago. He'd been practicing a lot, since there were times where Junmyeon was occupied with work, and he'd gotten much better. He was finally feeling ready to try and make that scarf. Doing it in front of Junmyeon initially hadn't been part of his plan, but he figured he could lie and tell him it was a present for his mother. Junmyeon was pretty gullible in that regard.

 

      He sat down on the couch beside the other man and started the movie. As the opening credits rolled, he started chaining on loops to his needle. Junmyeon gave him a surprised, albeit proud, look.

      “You're going to knit? What happened to watching the movie with me?”

      “I'm gonna watch that too,” Sehun reassured him. “I need to start this as soon as possible though otherwise I'll never finish it. School's gonna start soon and I'll be up to my eyes in papers and busy work.”

      “Right. Definitely don't miss that part of school,” Junmyeon sighed. “Although I'm still drowning in work I guess...” Junmyeon noticed the pink yarn in the bag and raise a brow. “You're using pink? Is it for your mom or something?”

      “Mhm, sure,” Sehun mumbled. Junmyeon pouted.

      “You don't have a secret lover, do you?”

      “Why in the world would you think that?” Sehun gasped, and the other man simply laughed.

      “I don't know. Just tossing the idea out there.”

      “Of course I don't have one,” Sehun answered, bottom lip poking out slightly as he frowned. “You're all I want.” A smile spread onto Junmyeon's face.

      “That's good to know. I don't think I could live without you.” He'd said it jokingly, but Sehun knew it was a true statement. For both of them. “But knitting in summer?” Junmyeon continued. “It's too hot to have your project draped over your lap. It's like wearing a blanket!”

      “It's a labor of love,” Sehun joked. That simply motivated Junmyeon to softly kick him in the head.

      “So cheesy.”

      “I can't believe you would kick your boyfriend like that!” Sehun huffed indignantly.

      “Watch the movie and knit your damn scarf.”

 

      Sehun frowned at him and Junmyeon simply stuck his tongue out Bickering like this had become a frequent part of more or less living together, but it was never malicious. Sehun actually found it rather fun to keep up most of the time. He would stop this time though, since he actually did intend to watch the movie with Junmyeon.

 

      By the time the end credits were rolling, Sehun had already knit about 6 inches of his scarf. He'd also helped Junmyeon eat half the bowl of popcorn. When the credits had finished, Junmyeon stretched and yawned, his toes poking Sehun's thigh. The latter still loved small touches like this. Junmyeon then rolled off the couch with a groan and started walking away.

      “Where are you going?” Sehun called, packing up his knitting in the bag.

      “Bathroom!” The other man responded. Sehun rolled his eyes.

      “It's cuz you chugged so much water during the movie.”

      “It's hot and popcorn is salty!”

      “Go piss already!” Sehun shouted. The bickering was back.

 

      Sehun sighed, letting his body relax and ooze down the couch slightly. It was amazing just how comfortable he'd become at Junmyeon's apartment. Even when he was dating Joohyun, her house had always felt foreign and somewhat intimidating to him. This place was virtually his second home. He even left a few sets of clothes and other necessary items there for convenience's sake. He was grateful he felt so at ease here and with Junmyeon in general.

 

      He heard the toilet flush down the hall and he unconsciously smiled, knowing the other man would be returning soon. Maybe he was cheesy after all, but he still got excited every time he saw Junmyeon. He couldn't help it. He just _really_ loved him.

 

      The older man walked back into the room, and Sehun expected him to sit down on the couch. He figured they would either watch another movie or make out. Instead, the man walked over to him and stood in front of him, smiling gently. His hands were behind his back.

      “What's up?” Sehun asked, looking up at him curiously.

      “I've been doing a lot of thinking lately,” Junmyeon started.

      “That might be a cause for worry,” Sehun mumbled sarcastically and Junmyeon lightly kicked him in the shin.

      “Anyways, I've been thinking about it, and you're over at my place more often than not, aren't you?”

      “Yeah...”

      “I was just thinking...If you wanted to, you could move in here. I wouldn't mind.” He held his hand out in front of him, revealing a key. “If nothing else, I'd like to at least give you a key to my place...”

      “R-Really...? You wouldn't mind if I lived here with you?”

      “You already do for the most part. I understand if you want to keep your own separate space to go home to, but I thought I would offer...”

      “What would you like me to do?” Sehun asked, reaching for his other hand that wasn't holding the key.

      “I would like you to move in with me,” Junmyeon said softly. Sehun's lips curled upwards and he grabbed the key from the other's palm.

      “Then I think I'd like to move in...The rest of the way anyways,” he laughed.

 

      Junmyeon chuckled and bent over so that his face was level with Sehun's. He placed his hands on the other boy's shoulders and leaned forward, connecting their lips. When he pulled back, he had one of the widest grins on his face that Sehun had ever seen.

      “Well then, welcome home, Sehun. I hope you'll like it here.”

      “I think I will. If nothing else, the company's nice...and damn attractive.”

 

      Junmyeon rolled his eyes, but he let Sehun pull him down by his hips so that he was straddling his lap. Sehun wrapped his arms around Junmyeon's lower waist, pressing him closer. Junmyeon's arms in turn wrapped around Sehun's neck. Their faces were inches away from each other, and Sehun instantly took care of that, pressing his lips to Suho's again, nibbling gently, playfully at his bottom lip.

      “I love you,” Junmyeon whispered, staring straight into Sehun's eyes.

      “I love you too,” Sehun breathed, lips brushing against Junmyeon's with each word. “So damn much.”

 

      Junmyeon kissed Sehun, tongue pressing into his mouth and hands cupping his cheeks. Sehun let out a sound that was half-sigh, half-hum, letting Junmyeon take the lead. He would _never_ get enough of the other man's kisses. When Junmyeon pulled away, he laid his head on Sehun's shoulder, nuzzling into his neck softly. Sehun brought his hands up to the man's back, rubbing small circles and feeling the firm muscles through the thin fabric of his shirt. Every part of Junmyeon was so beautiful. Sehun would never be able to wrap his mind around it.

      “Thank you,” Sehun muttered into Junmyeon's hair. “For everything.”

 

      Junmyeon nodded slightly and hummed in response. Sehun knew the other felt the same way, but he was too busy cuddling to say so. He also knew that this would only last for a few minutes before Junmyeon started whining about how it was too hot, so there was no way Sehun was going to say anything that might end it early.

 

      Being with Junmyeon had once been a luxury, but now it had become an everyday occurrence. It would only increase once Sehun moved in. Junmyeon may not have been a 'luxury' anymore, but he was still no less valuable. Junmyeon was Sehun's happiness. He didn't think he'd mind if his entire world revolved around the man. He didn't know what his future would hold for him from now on either, but he knew it would be with Junmyeon.

 

      At the end of the day, Sehun knew three things for certain. He loved Junmyeon more than anything. Junmyeon loved him just as much. And he would kick, fight, and scream to keep this relationship going and make sure Junmyeon was happy. Oh, and he would finish the scarf in record time so he could finally see Junmyeon in pink. That felt like a good enough plan for the future for now.


End file.
